Are you the sort of man who would put the poison into his own goblet or his enemy’s?

Read it, don’t read it, I don’t care…just needed to get some things off my chest.

In no particular order of chronology or importance…

On the clock.  Speed version.  Day rant.  Let’s turn and burn.

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1)       Greetings and salutations, people.  Thanks for joining me.  I wonder if Mike Woodson will drop a line to Tennessee basketball.  They are both confused entities.

2)      MAD props and congratulations to Meb Keflezighi, who has the most American name I have ever heard, and who became the first American male to win the Boston Marathon since 1983.  Winning a marathon as an American is a big deal regardless.  Winning the year after last year’s tragedy is incredible.

3)      I have a feeling Keyshawn Johnson’s jokes won’t be quite as funny this year for NFL since we can look at him and know that he is violent with women.  Stop smashing girlfriend’s phone, dude.

4)      The Texans GM says he prefers Mack over Clowney, which means we can watch the poisoning scene from Princess Bride and break out a flow chart to REALLY know what he means with this.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0sPVEBAtwmg

5)      Rick Adelman will retire from the NBA/ knows he is getting forced out within the next day.  Way to beat the firing, bro.

6)      Mike Woodson did NOT beat the firing.  Word is that each coaching candidate has to submit two different offensive schemes during interviews with Phil…one with the black holes that are Melo and JR Smith, and one running a typical, sharing, winning offense.

7)      Andy Dalton says he expects a new deal since he IS the face of the Cincinnati Bengals.  No one is sure WHO he is cracking on or building up in that statement.

8)      Dallas, most of us don’t care that Tony Romo is back at practice.

9)      “Calipari will meet with possible NBA bound players.”  I don’t get this.  So, this just means is is having a team meeting with all players, correct?  Just call it a “meeting.”

10)   I do not like this new hockey 1-4 seeding, and the fact that they are not reseeding after each round.

11)   He has a lot of antics, but just when we think he might not be worth the headache, Yasiel Puig has a night like last night.  Three run homer and he throws a guy out at second.  Not a bad night, kid.  Don’t drive yourself home.

12)   Paul George wants the guarding responsibilities of Jeff Teague next game.  I didn’t watch the game, but I can assume by the score that this was not the ONLY problem.

13)   The Wizards beat the Bulls in Game 1 of what might end up being the ugliest quality series we have seen in a long time.  The Bulls will rally. They have come too far in Major League to not win a series.

14)   That Brewers brawl was pretty dumb if you ask me.

15)   Monologue.  Rockets-Blazers.  The Rockets make it SO hard to believe they are contenders.  You have a bunch of shooters, and an idiot inside who just happened to be born with that same Shannon Sharpe ridiculous type of body.   Dwight Howard does NOT act or play like he wants to win a championship if you ask me.  The Rockets were up 86-73 at HOME early in the fourth quarter.  Their collapse was ridiculous and once again involved Snowball (as regular readers know I call Dwight) missing free throws after being hacked on purpose away from the ball.  In the meantime, the Blazers have two very hungry and quickly maturing players who WANT to win something for one of the most diehard basketball cities there are out there.  Aldridge had Wilt numbers.  Truly.  46 points and 18 rebounds.  He fouled out in OT, but luckily his Robin/ Damian Lillard (they switch Batman and Robin roles regularly) finished off his 31 point game by taking over the end of the game.   I seriously am slightly more scared of the Blazers than the Rockets if I am San Antonio.  Reason?  Because I think mentally the Spurs will OWN the Rockets.  The Blazers have young guys who don’t care and have the eye of the tiger.  I think they are more dangerous against an aging, more experienced team.

16)   That is it.  Hope you enjoyed or are at least more informed.  Will I blog tomorrow?  That is a CLOWN question, bro.  Peace.  And start running hard to first base, dammit.