Do you realize in the entire history of western civilization no one has successfully accomplished the roommate switch?
Read it, don’t read it, I don’t care…just needed to get some things off my chest.
In no particular order of chronology or importance…
On the clock…sort of. Let’s turn and burn.
TWITTER: @fillerbuster11
1) Very quietly, Seattle already got a win for the NFL playoffs. It wasn’t big news, but the fact that their quality CB Richard Sherman just won his PED appeal is big for them. That side of the field just got a little smaller for any opposing QB’s.
2) Flow chart, please. Greg McElroy admitted to concussion symptoms and therefore will not start this week in their finale. What do they do? They “skip” over Tim Tebow again and will start Mark Sanchez. I, the president of the Tim Tebow Hater Club, don’t even get this. If there was ONE game to give Tebow a shot, why not the meaningless finale? Rex Ryan also said to the media that he would NOT welcome his firing. I will tell you what. WE the masses would. Between Ryan and Tebow, and if they were not there anymore, the wire would clear up MASSIVELY and eliminate my constant calling for flow charts. Ok. Well, maybe the first thing at least.
3) Dwight Howard was fined 35k for a flagrant foul the other night. What he should have said in response is that the foul was the retaliatory culmination of all of the Hack a Howard or Strike a Dwight as I like to call it.
4) Dwayne Wade got banned a game without pay for kicking Ramon Sessions in the nuts. The Heat can write all of the documents they want to back to the league, he definitively kicked him in the junk. Done and done. It is not the end of the world. You all play a shitty team in your “ban.”
5) The Nets fire Avery Johnson and are targeting Phil Jackson. First of all, what is with all of this early season firing of coaches on teams that will NOT end up bad (i.e Lakers)? Second of all, maybe you should have checked it out with Phil first before assuming you can get him. Third, maybe you should have rode out Avery until after the season, when you and your rich owner will probably be first on the auction for rent a star Dwight Howard…and THEN bring in Phil.
6) Why does the media think that Dirk Nowitzki will be sharp right away in his comeback from injury? Can you all give him a FEW games to get into his groove?
7) Bobby Knight was a brilliant coach, and a decent announcer, but I think he is losing it slightly between the ears. Here is a comment last night. “I don’t get that call. That is a call you either call or don’t call.” Thanks for clearing THAT up, Bobby.
8) The Duke-Cincy football bowl game (Belk Bowl???) wasn’t exactly what you would call a QUALITY game, but it sure as hell had a little bit of everything in it. Exciting game, and Duke STILL hasn’t won a bowl game since 1961.
9) Hey, kids. If you don’t think you would like to be a rock star, check out this. THIS guy (Rolling Stones) married THIS chick:
10) If you would like to check out a couple not as mainstream teams that are going to jack up YOUR bracket come March, then you should be watching this Baylor-Gonzaga game right now. Or, the New Mexico-Cincy game last night. Or, any game involving UNLV or Creighton. THAT, my friends, is a hit list.
11) USC QB Matt Barkley will not start his bowl game, ending his college career. Someone watch that guy when he is alone. We don’t want him thinking TOO much about how cool he was in coming back to school, and now how many millions of dollars he cost himself with a subpar season.
12) Bears CB Charles Tillman called Calvin Johnson the “LeBron” of the NFL. I was going to say no way, but think about THIS. He just broke the all time record for receiving yards with MATTHEW STAFFORD throwing to him. Wow.
13) Hideki Matsui retires from MLB. Talk about one big Godzilla flash in the pan. I will buy you a beer if you can tell me the three teams he played with after his brief stint with glory with the Yankees. Not saying it is splitting the atom or anything. Just saying it is a thinker.
14) Flow chart, please. So, let me get this straight. Jeff Saturday gets benched last week on his OWN team for poor play, but still gets voted to the Pro Bowl. Arguably the best center in football, Vikings John Sullivan does NOT get the votes, loses a 500k bonus, but still starts for his team. Confused.
15) How the mighty have fallen. It feels like yesterday that Butch Davis had every pro and college team in the nation drooling over him as their head coach. Now? He is not allowed out of his UNC contract yet to go to FIU. Hold on. I just realized that FIU is all caps anyway. How about FIU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
16) If you read this rant regularly, you are aware of my Mike Napoli-Red Sox trade fixation. If you care, he is STILL not officially signed. Double secret probation stuff going on there.
17) Nadal is officially out of the Aussie Open. We expected this like we expect Ron Artest to say dumb stuff into the microphone. Now, we will await the big announcement that he will finally come back for the…ummm…oh yeah. French Open. Like I have been saying for the last 9 months or so.
18) Signed, sealed, and delivered. Do you know what a nice juicy losing season does for your coaching status when you are not allowed contact and they suck without you? Yes. It RAISES your stock madly. Anyway, the Saints just inked Payton today for 5 years. Smart, smart, smart…on both sides. You don’t want to go to Dallas, Sean. Jerry sound like an ass to work for.
19) Shut up, Donovan McNabb. Seriously. We all can put together facts ourselves without you talking to us. Yes, it has been a tough year for the Eagles. No, we don’t want to hear about how Eagles fans didn’t know how good they had it. You know what? I KIND of take that back. Barely. If you would have gotten ONE freaking Super Bowl, I think I wouldn’t mind you on the microphone. Go away for now.
20) The Raiders will start Terrelle Pryor this week. Yay. With all of his college problems and the idiot he is, he is PERFECT to lead the legendary franchise that is the Raiders.
21) What is UP with all of these college kids getting banned from bowl games? Another two down. McCoy and Hicks from Texas. Out of commission. I know I say a lot of the bowls are worthless, but that is WATCHING them, not playing in them.
22) The Clippers won their 15th straight. The bandwagon is filling up, people. Jump on while you can. I already had said last year Blake Griffin was one of my favorite players in the league. I don’t have shotgun, but I have a little butt room in the back seat.
23) The NHL did something today. Some comprehensive offer to the players. I would tell you more, but I read updates about the NHL like I do Woody Paige columns…every 7 words or so.
24) I watched Killer Karaoke last night for 15 minutes. I had to give it a shot since there was nothing on, and so I can crack on it for the rest of my life. You aren’t missing much. It is just fear factor with irritating singing. Save that hour of your life, and you are welcome.
25) If anyone cares, the weirdest thing in sports is STILL going on. Wyoming basketball is STILL undefeated and one of only a few undefeated teams left in the land. I am NOT saying they are good. They aren’t. But, voters, come on. They are 12-0. I don’t care if they beat all Division II or directional schools, can we at least reward them for a week by RANKING them? Geez.
26) Now that I have all of the Seinfelds on DVD, it is difficult for me to choose an episode to coerce Lindsey to watch. As I look on my floor and see Seinfelds all over my living room floor during last night’s selection process (ended up with The Switch), I am worried she might regret that Christmas gift in the next few weeks. I am like a kid in a candy store. This is not as bad as having a Golden Tee machine in my apartment, but it IS dangerous.
27) Speaking of Seinfeld, I think Cashmere Wright (Cincy basketball) is my favorite name in the college game right now.
28) That is it. Hope you enjoyed. Will I blog tomorrow? That is a CLOWN question, bro. Peace.