Catch Of The Day

I Can See You’re Out of Aces

Filler

I Can See You’re Out Of Aces

The Cast

Date: 21 March 2020

FILLERBUSTER’S ELEVEN

BACKGROUND:  This started as a long-winded numbered blog.  It transformed into an organized long-winded category blog.  Now, it is a quick-hitter to ease your pain.  I lack time.  So, the preparation of the blog actually made me procrastinate from writing the thing.  Let’s see who makes the cut.  Barely edited as usual unfortunately, so please excuse any mistakes during my stream of consciousness.  I feel the need…the need for speed.  Let’s turn and burn.

SETTING: You might THINK I had more time to put something out more quickly, given the circumstances.  That was not the case, the Ecuador travel journal was first in line to complete anyway while my mind was fresh, and let’s just get to it.  I WILL say that given the circumstances, you might get more than one a week for a bit.

  1. EVERGREEN:  MILES AWAY FROM ORDINARY.  Yup, the Corona beer tagline sums it up.  I came back from Ecuador to see life close up shop.  I have a new Google doc tab that says “things to buy if a shelter in place occurs.”  We ARE miles away from ordinary.  Casinos close.  No more than 1000 people.  No more than 50 people.  No more than 10 people.  My wife has had a bomb cyclone and virus ban in two consecutive years of birthdays.  Toilet paper is the new Cabbage Patch Kid riot.  We didn’t even get to ENJOY watching games without fans, because then games were cancelled too.  Times Square looks like I Am Legend II.  I can’t go to President’s Club, the thing I work all year for.  I can’t go back to UVA to see my beloved school and finally show my wife the DC sites and be like Forrest Gump and jump in the Reflecting Pool.  I could get paid $4500 to GET COVID-19 and I actually thought long and hard about it.  We are naming top teams for the year without the madness.  UVA gets to be the first team to be a two-year defending champion without playing a game, and they were playing well about now.  Donald Trump talks serious about COVID with sunglasses tan around his eyes from golf.  I am working from home.  NBA players who kid about the virus GET the virus.  Mark Cuban wants to pay employees from games because he is the man.  Spring training is cancelled, but idiot college kids still go to Clearwater.  Amen Corner is silent in April.  Seniors miss their last ride to glory. The NFL draft might happen without irritating Eagles and Giants fans yelling significant nothings at kids picked they don’t even know.  Futbol is cancelled.  Kevin Durant is announcing things in the offseason that have nothing to do with team movement.  Robert Kraft is sad about massage parlors shutting down.  The tax deadline is being pushed.  Bars are figuring out creative ways to deliver liquor.  We all now know what “shelter in place” means and feel like watching The Purge tonight for some reason.  Someone today searched for powder milk in the grocery store aisles and was too embarrassed to ask where it was.  And yes, even the National Spelling Bee was cancelled.  Stay safe everyone.  This is March Sadness.  Remember what Frankl says in Man’s Search For Meaning.  There is no best chess move as everything is situation to situation, make others proud of us how WE handle this right now, and those who have a WHY to live can bear any HOW.  And finally, my boss, Matt, makes an analogy about everything under the sun.  He can’t speak a sentence without referencing something other than what he is talking about.  He is a genius though, so that is not a diss.  And he had one for this COVID thing.  It isn’t like we LOST a leg, folks.  We BROKE a leg.  We will be ramped up really, really fast after this pause is over, so be ready in whatever you do.
  2. EVERGREEN 2:  Happy Weeks.  Sure, this will sound hollow, selfish, and vicious.  But, I have to say it.  Coronavirus, I don’t hate you for what you are doing.  I don’t hate you for how you are doing it.  You are a virus.  You don’t have a brain about other consequences.  But, dammit, your timing stinks.  I think my favorite two weeks of the year are Final Four and Title game, and then The Masters.  Two totally different sports that get me all worked up for totally different reasons.  One has kids giving one shining moment, the other is trying to get a small golf ball into a cup on at the most beautiful setting in all of sports.  You suck, COVID-19.  If you wait three freaking months, we have some down time in sports.  NBA Playoffs are done, Stanley Cup has been crowned, and football hasn’t kicked off.  But, you take from me the most magical couple of weeks in my sports life.  The only time I have chuckled in the last week was listening to Jay Bilas, with a straight face and God bless his soul, break down the Eastern bracket for best college basketball player ever and complain about the committee giving Danny Manning an EIGHT seed.  First of all, that had to be tough to do.  Go beat your friends at poker tonight, Jay.  Second, it IS BS that Danny and the Miracles would be an 8 seed in the Christian Laettner bracket.  And I would take Danny to win that one.  Damn you, COVID.  I can’t believe I haven’t thrown my computer out the window after writing that.
  3. NFL:  Thank you Crocs, for giving the talking heads something to talk about for ten hours a day for three straight days.  Tom Brady will oddly be a Buccaneer.  Doesn’t make sense for history and The Hoodie must have really pissed him off.  Enough to not listen to Joe Montana as a Chief, Franco as a Seahawk, or Jerry as a Bronco.  But, do they have the weapons?  Yes.  Why don’t we have Gronk take a break from WWE and be on the other side of OJ Howard and call it a day?  They will draft that short kid from LSU and be NASTY.  Dak Prescott got money.  For one year.  That is what he wanted.  I will still hate him as the guy who turned down $30 million without ever winning anything, but now he has that paycheck and can earn his next paycheck and get his long term contract.  I personally am rooting against him now.    The Bills got Josh Norman.  They are making plays, and gaining attitude too.  And they lost the Golden Boy from their division.  Great week.  Expanding the NFL playoffs and expanding the NFL season are mistakes times ten.  Someone tell me why the Titans overpaid for Ryan Tannehill BEFORE the cards were on the table.  Kenny Rogers would roll over in his grave.  The NFL draft will occur without a public.  What are we to do without those noisy Giants and Eagles fans bitching at every selection?  I know.  I said that twice.  The Cardinals got Hopkins.  They pretty much stole him if you ask me.  But, if Kyler Murray CAN see over the O-line, then Hopkins limits his excuses.  I am not saying that what the Bills did with getting Stefon Diggs was brilliant, but if I am a fan, I am happy about the action overall.  So, now Derek Carr is a QB who just needs pushed, and Marcus Mariota is a QB who needs to push someone.  I am pretty sure that Amari Cooper is living one of those lives we will be questioning people in bars about 20 years from now.  No winning, but getting paid like mad.  If him, Dak, and Zeke win nothing for their career, line up your all time trivia questions.  Cam Newton is surprised that the Panthers signed Teddy Bridgewater, but wasn’t he already aware that the Panthers and most of America already didn’t like him?   Yes.  I am letting Brees let ME know when he is done if I am the Saints GM.  He still threw for 4k.  I feel like every CB in the NFL is angry, but definitely think that Malcolm Jenkins and Darius Slay lead the list.  Glad they have new locations to complain about in 10 months.  Jenkins is obviously pulling a Karl Malone and chasing rings at this point.  Wait.  My bad.  Emmanuel Sanders is obviously pulling the Karl Malone.  Saints?  Chase away.  The Steelers might have kept a rapist as a QB years ago, but what they are doing with Ryan Shazier is the coolest thing like ever in sports.  So proud to be a fan of them.  The Rapist has no pain in his elbow now.  Say what you will, but he changes that team and we are contenders with him, folks.  Phillip Rivers is smart.  He knows he has lost a step on his normally slow step, and the Colts have the best offensive line in football.  Good situation.  I am not surprised that Jason Witten came back to football, but I AM surprised that he A) stayed a second year B) went to Vegas team.  So, Mitch Trubisky will get hurt, Nick Foles will win two games in the playoffs, and then get another monster contract.  This is Matt Cassell on crack.  The Broncos are putting a lot of stock in a QB they waited until the second round to draft and who won 4  meaningless games when they were done.  The Broncos lost Chris Harris.  Harris can forever say it is NOT about the money, but he went to the Chargers, a rival, so it IS about the money.  I would have kept Flacco if I was the Donkeys.  Don’t burn bridges.  The Falcons got Fowler and Todd Gurley.  Nice pickups.  Todd Gurley basically ruined the Bell situation with me and the Steelers and now is getting paid less than what Bell was bitching about.  I hear players are trying to join Tom Brady on the Bucs.  Like NBA players joining a super team.  I would dig the Steelers overpaying Clay Matthews for a linebacker I love to watch.  I admire John Elway.  I thought I had him figured out.  Picking up Melvin Gordon is the equivalent of staying on an off suited 7-2 in our hypothetical poker game.  I love my boys.  We love two tight ends.  Eric Ebron?  Wow.  Vance and Eric on opposite sides?  Whoa.  I usually know the end game of most situations, but I am asking for the MOON if I am Chris Godwin holding onto that #12 jersey.  The MOON.
  4. COLLEGE BASKETBALL:  Seems hollow writing my notes right now.  Creighton was a hot pick for the brackets, but their losses were really, really bad.  Look them up.  I am sad about talking about Dayton ALL year, them about to be a #1 seed, and then not getting to show you how right I was.  Obi Toppin was about to blow your mind.  UVA was just hitting stride.  I wanted to see 10 teams from the Big Ten make the Sweet Sixteen, and then have none of them actually win it.  I liked KU overall, and would have had them in my Elite Eight.  I did NOT like their depth.  One of their big two gets in foul trouble?  It is all over.  I wanted to see Nebraska play with its football players in the conference tourney.  Rick Pitino being at Iona reminds me of when Lane Kiffin ended up at Florida Atlantic.  Anthony Edwards declared for the draft as expected.  He won’t hit the canopy in the next level.  I almost cried this week when reading about projections for the tourney.  Wisco and UVA were the hot picks for the Final Four.  Agree.
  5. NBA:  I would just like to say PROPS to you, Adam Silver, for leading the charge on this coronavirus bans.  You lead, and every other league followed.
  6. MLB:  Assuming this COVID thing clears up so we get close to 162 games of baseball, know this.  THIS is the year of Ohtani Craze 2, and Mike Trout will quietly be winning another MVP, making an appearance in the playoffs, and the Angels will make a serious run at the World Series.  Book it.
  7. MISCELLANEOUS:  If you wonder what sports DO continue, they are the ones in the frigid cold away from everyone and around dogs, who don’t need to do social distancing.  Someone won in their second attempt.  Impressive.  Also, the Big Three might be my favorite story of the week.  They might go on, and just quarantine everyone who plays.  Basically, a Big Brother but in basketball.  I am IN.
  8. THIS AND THAT:  I got an email from Danielle Sharp the other day.  She is in marketing for Bad Axe Throwing.  Really????  Man’s Search For Meaning is one of the best reads you will ever partake in.  And less than 200 pages.  Buy it.  Now.  You might never hear me complain about anything in my life ever again.  21 Bridges was OK.  It was the same cop killer premise we have seen a million times, done the same exact way, and gave me nothing in life.   If you think Terminator MIGHT be the exact same formula they use over and over again and they won’t dare try it again, you are right and don’t watch it.  The upcoming movie Bloodshot looks like Matrix 4.  I think Samuel Jackson is in every single movie.  Spiral, which has him in it, is another Saw?  Quiet Place 2 better let me eat popcorn in the theater this time.  The Hunt has already been done, folks.  It was called Surviving the Game and had Ice Tea as the lead.  I am now more impressed by Maria Sharapova.  I had no idea she had made enough money to be a Shark on Shark Tank.  Star Wars IS the only movie where ghosts are cool.  Poachers killed the ONLY female white giraffe left, there is only one male left, and why are people so freaking stupid and mean?  Blake Shelton has a lot of good NON-country singers on his team this year, and he has the first ROCKER in years.  80’s rocker.  Come on!  In case your mattress money is a lot more than mine…  https://www.marketwatch.com/story/the-worlds-most-expensive-hotel-room-has-a-bar-made-out-of-medical-waste-2020-02-27  I saw a baguette at the zoo the other day.  It was bread in captivity.  Someone keep Joe Biden away from COVID-19 if he is going to win this thing, and it really depresses me we have NO good people under the age of 60 in politics these days.  Jojo Rabbit was a feel good movie that you don’t expect.  I understand why it was nominated, and I also understand why it didn’t win.  My notes on Invisible Man are ultra sensitive but have to be said.  Did I like the movie?  Sure.  B-.  My comments/problems. Yes, there are spoilers in this rant.   Opening scene was SO 1982.  We didn’t get to meet the guy, and that was a flaw.  How did they find her for mail?  It is initially, for about 10 minutes, fun trying to find him in the scene.  Why does everyone NOT turn on lights when scared?  I am not clear HOW he dodged the thrown sheet in the chair.  I found his invisible tricks boring initially, until the shit hit the fan.  Missing artwork…good.  They should have named the movie something else non-cheesy.  Drug bottle reappearing…good.  Email to sister…good.  Hitting Sydney…good.  Why is she sleeping WITH the kid and not on the couch?  It would have been better to explain relationship with James earlier.  Where did James and Sydney GO while what’s her name could have a war with the invisible man in THEIR place?   She found a cell phone.  Nothing else done with it.  The secret stash spot SHOULD have been important, but wasn’t’.  Did NOT see the dinner murder coming.  Saw the pregnancy coming from a mile away.  The brother being in on it I did NOT see coming at all…good.  Escape from mental institute was…good.  Killing of brother…good.  Adrian in basement…good.  But here are my really, really BIG problems with the movie.  HOW did they fool the medics and authorities on his death?  Not explained.  Did anyone wonder how the DOG was taking care of itself for two weeks?  HOW did she suddenly know how to put on this invisible suit in the time it takes to go freshen up?  And HOW can she call 911 and then just walk away so coolly without waiting for the police?  Moving on.  Sloan’s Lake Tap and Burger has a new menu.  Go there.  Eat truffle popcorn at the Alamo Draft House and you are welcome.  Don’t ever go to Costco when Twitter has pictures of the lines.  They aren’t lying.  Lindsey had a birthday party on Friday and we had a cool group, and I do believe that might be the last cool party thrown for quite a while.  Billions starts May 3rd and it looks off the hook.  Ozark starts soon and you should catch up…now.  Westworld started its season and you can watch it starting right now and be just as confused as the rest of us.  Outsider got really weird, but resolved itself, was worth it, and the last 10 seconds will make you fall off the couch if you have been paying attention.  Our last meal before restaurants shut down was Bar Dough.  My fav.  Sad.  Anyone else totally space it was St. Patty’s Day with everything shutting down?  Keep ordering from your favorite places.  Otherwise, your favorite place might not be there when the smoke clears.  I am a 14 year veteran in the service industry.  I feel for them monstrously.  We were watching the Shark Tank GOAT episode and I totally spaced that RING didn’t even get a deal.  Has to be the biggest non-deal ever.  It snowed in Denver yesterday.  It mostly melted today.  Love Denver weather.  I don’t read 5 things on CNN these days, because everything is literally all about COVID and it irritates me.  I forgot we HADN’T finished Chernobyl.  Probably because it is so sad and depressing we didn’t want to be more down and sad.  Anyway, watch it.  It is good, and the final episode plugs the holes.  Finally, very sad to know that Kenny Rogers has died.  I realized that Lucille and Gambler were the only solo songs he was known for, but MAN, was Gambler one of the best ever.
  9. THE FILLERBUSTER:  I admit to shedding a little tear at 4pm on Sunday, Selection Sunday.  I was going to tell you about my upcoming exciting trips, but they are all now cancelled.  If you like the movie Crash, then you can be the opposite of every other thing I like, and we will be fine.  Superfan and Moral Panic are two of my favorite IPA’s, and Bar Dough has both…when it is open.  Last supper out.  Queso at Senor Bear, and pasta at Bar Dough.  I really, really miss games occurring and having money on a lot of them.  I had the normal flu ALL this week.  Couldn’t tell anyone, as they would assume it was COVID-19.  Sad I had to hide it.  I am not GOOD at doing it, but MAN I love building spreadsheets of any sort.  My work friends are organizing an online poker get together.  I don’t want to play.  I am not the best poker player, but I am the toughest to read when IN THE ROOM TOGETHER.  Online sucks.
  10. Let’s just round up to 11.  Not a lot of sports going on right now…
  11. TWEET OF THE WEEK

ALTERNATE CATEGORIES THAT DIDN’T MAKE THE CUT:

  1. THE BEST WORKOUT SONG EVER FOR THIS WEEK (because the best song this week IS the best song ever…for now):
  2. QUOTE OF THE WEEK
  3. LINKS TO SAVE YOU TIME IN LIFE
  4. TRAVEL
  5. THIS WEEK’S LIST
  6. MY NUMBERS
  7. GONE FISHING (the riddle for money):
  8. PICS BY MY PIXEL (pictures from my phone):
  9. LIFEGUARD ENTRY:
  10. COLLEGE FOOTBALL
  11. NHL

The theme?  Well, the COVID-19 scare sure took the wind out of my probably clever Ecuador trip blog theme.  But then, Kenny died, so he made the theme easier. He has to trump all of this.

My LONG notes from my Ecuador trip are below.  I haven’t filtered through the 1330 pics I took, but ping me if you want any of them.  A lot of them are mind blowing.

And our weekly reminder of the greatest sequel ever made coming out next summer… Top Gun 2.   https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=epgkqPJ_bc0

MWTILMGBDEOASMGUWGEMCDFTWBIPMFBRMBWC

That’s it for today.  Hope you enjoyed or are at least more informed.  Remember two things.  First, feed yourself, feed your family, but always, always remember to…feed the wolf.  Second,  if you can’t spot the sucker in your first half hour at the table, then you are the sucker.  Will I blog again?  That is a CLOWN question, bro.  As one shepherd said to the other shepherd, let’s get the flock out of here.

VERO BEACH FEBRUARY 2020

  • Feb 26-Feb 28
  • When your alarm goes off before 3am for a flight, it jacks up your system fully.  Not only do you sometimes get UBER surging from bar traffic, but you are later surprised by how many other people woke up when you did.  DIA is worse given that it is 40 minutes away.
  • People in masks at airports are now “normal.”
  • When you fly to Orlando, you sometimes forget where you are going until they kids line up between the A and B group on Southwest.  Disney.  Kids.  Ugghhh.
  • They call the bus thing at Orlando Airport the Automated People Mover
  • We drove by construction for a high-speed train they are adding an Orlando tributary for.
  • We stopped by my parents’ place on the way in.
  • We stay at the beach when we visit them, and we tried a new area.  We have stayed many places in the northern area of Vero Beach (at the beach), but tried a more quaint place a mile or two south of the main area.  I would suggest Caribbean Court to people if you go there, but not if you want anything else around you (two Italian places only).    Basically, a cute place with awesome grounds, but nowhere to go at night unless you have a car.
  • So…we went upstairs to Havana Nights, a piano bar upstairs at the hotel.  Good decision.  We met Tom and Tommy (servers) and Jodie (bartender).  Good time closing the bar (at 10pmish) and I even got on the keys.
  • We visited Mom and Dad’s again on Thursday.  Hung out around the house, watched some TV, and went to Dillard’s.  Ironically, even though I am from cold Colorado and was visiting warm Miami, I bought a North Face pullover for cheap.  Solves the problem of my wife hating the puke green one I had purchased on my own.
  • Havana Nights Take 2.  They dragged me up to play one more time.
  • We had breakfast at Mulligan’s, in the main part of the beach area.  I recommend the benedict with gravy and ask for Hollandaise too.  Mix them.
  • Off to the Miami Airport on Friday morning.  Heading to Miami to fly to Ecuador.  Ecuador.  Wow.  Surreal.

ECUADOR MARCH 2020

  • Feb 28-March 10
  • Day 1
  • You might find some of this extracurricular, but this is for MY records/ travel journal to remind Linds and I where we have been, and I don’t feel like shortening it for the blog.
  • I read 40 pages of Wikipedia on the plane before visiting.  There is the Coastal region, the Sierra region, and the rain forest region.
  • I learned during this trip that traveling to the equator is NOT about getting a tan.  It is about covering every single SPOT on your body with high SPF sunscreen, because it WILL find your misses.
  • Ecuador is Eastern time.  I think in my head I had North and South America more lined up.  Whoops.
  • It is surreal driving from Vero Beach to Miami, knowing we will be in South America by the end of day.
  • Florida drivers are horrible, but I knew that already.
  • We stopped by Delray Beach since we had a little free time on way down.  Hidden GEM.  Water was clear, sand was perfect, and no one was there.  Highly recommend.  Cool town from 95 to the beach too.  We will put it on the list of places to revisit.
  • We tried to return rental.  My Achilles Heel is finding a gas station.  We had some problems, but worked it out.  We got a little more stressed after getting gas and being in a traffic jam and being by more Florida drivers.  HAD to get off the road.  I moved West for a reason.
  • The Miami Airport stinks.  Hate it.  You have to walk everywhere, and signage is ridiculous.
  • We wanted a few drinks before jumping on plane, as I needed to clear the driving stress.  The Grill was OK, and airport prices make a quick drive-by still painful.  But what the hell?  We are going to SOUTH AMERICA.
  • We got “preferred” seating on American.  It was still tiny and my knees were jammed for many hours.  I prefer my knees NOT to touch when paying more for a seat.  I am only 6’3”.  Come on.
  • This was a pillows and dinner flight.  Yay, and nay.  Yay for food.  Nay for bad food.  I ate it, since I wasn’t sure when I would eat next.  No idea of what we are walking into down there.
  • I watched Jojo Rabbit on the flight.  I hadn’t researched the movie, but nothing like I thought.  Solid movie.  I get why it was nominated, but understand why it didn’t win also.
  • I watched the beginning and middle of the new Terminator.  I watched it until Arnold made his appearance.  I have no need to see any more, nor know the end.
  • I am now offering the window seat to my wife each flight.  She didn’t accept this time.  It was pitch black when we landed, so she is once again the smart one.
  • We arrived at about 10pm.  No Exoticca sign.  Not a good sign.  We ended up being stranded.  Luckily, we are experienced travelers, and Lindsey speaks enough Spanish, so we made it to hotel. 
  • Ahhh.  Foreign driving.  We had the curviest road possible, complete with passing ON those curves, lots of excitement, and I think I am numb to the road rules at this point.
  • A group who was at the airport was at the hotel.  Apparently, Exoticca had the wrong head count and left without us.  Sweet.
  • Off to bed, hoping the rest goes ok.
  • Day 2
  • We woke up and ate breakfast first.  Included breakfast.  Relatively normal breakfast with the odd differences.  The fruit tasted extra good though.  Papayas were part of them.
  • Then, we met in the lobby, followed by an odd split up of groups, and then a really, really weak PPT.  But, we now have a water container that screws shut.  Not being sarcastic.
  • I am not laughing at that.  I carried it the whole time.
  • We then are led off to buses to meet our tour guide for the next few days.  Alejandro.  He ended up being the glue that held everything together, along with a very knowledgeable guide who taught us a lot.
  • We head to Old Town.  We are told many times already about the pickpockets on the street.  I have cargo shorts with buttons.  I also have this cheesy thing that hangs from my neck.  I am unstoppable.
  • The Basilic Church is the first stop.  Pretty.  It overlooked a hill with a beautiful statue on it.  We got some pics from outside, and realized very quickly that being at elevation near the equator is brutal in the sun. This is going to take some adjustment.
  • We head further into Old Town.
  • Next stop is Independence Square/ The Big Apple.  The Capitol building is here.  Cool spot, very busy.
  • We walk to El Sagario Church (I am NOT looking up the spelling on all of these names, so just bear with me or Google it yourself-I have LOTS to write).  Beautiful, and we get a look inside.
  • I will spout out facts along the way.
  • Ecuador is mostly Roman Catholic.  The Spaniards brought this to them.
  • There are 86 volcanoes in Ecuador.  Amazing amount.  Some inactive, but lots still active.  They didn’t even finish the first church we saw because they are superstitious and think it might erupt if they finish it.
  • And they get tremors frequently.  We didn’t get any.
  • Narrow walkway to another area.  Construction and a wall. 
  • We come out of this alley and guess what?  First cell phone down.  The pickpockets are the KIDS.  My shit is hanging from my neck.  If someone grabs my shit, that means I am down too.
  • Another town square.  I am getting the feeling there are a lot of squares.  The Virgin With Wings overlooks the whole part of the city.  It is sort of beautiful.  This one has the Church of San Francisco overlooking it.  Pretty, majestic church, and San Francisco is all over the place around here.
  • Wile sorting out the lost cell phone, our Alejandro luckily does a head count and realizes we are down a person.  Person stayed at Independence Square and didn’t hear not one, but TWO new meet spots.
  • There is a service going on in San Francisco’s church, so we move on.
  • The city transitions from city people to indigenous people quickly.  We walk to one of those areas, and walk by a PURE medicine shop.  People on the street sell fruit and other goods.  This was Rocofuerto Street.
  • Wait.  Another phone down somehow.  But, the woman is not sure if she brought it or not, so the situation is hazy.
  • We learn that things are inverted here.  Poor people live ON the hill, not rich people.  The hood is actually if you walked up the hill towards the Virgin With Wings.  Weird.
  • I walk when I write notes, and have something that looks like “Sic Morales” on the sheet.  Not sure, folks.
  • We walk down Calle De Ronda, the oldest street in Old Town.  We hit another town square.  This is  where Dominican Church overlooks stuff.  People sit in the middle of the square on a statue, waiting to be fed we think. 
  • We learn that 40% of Ecuador is poor.  4% is considered rich.
  • We learn of some lunch places near our hotel to visit, and are told to do the cable cars or visit the Chapel of Man (we didn’t-we aren’t museum people).
  • We are told about potato soup (Locro) which apparently will be everywhere and is kind of a national dish.  Potatoes, avocadoes, cheese.  That works for me.  I love cheese and potatoes.  I tolerate avocadoes because they don’t taste like anything.
  • We learn that Ecuador is largely regional, and in many areas tribal, meaning there is more regional loyalty than national loyalty.
  • We learn there are 3 million people in Quito, 16 million in Ecuador total.
  • People eat a good breakfast here, focus on a monstrous lunch, and then eat, but don’t really care too much about dinner.  Anyway, lunch is the most important meal.
  • Bananas taste a little different here, and although Panama hats are a global product, they are shipped from Ecuador, not Panama.
  • We had lunch at a Greek place nearby our hotel (Mercure Hotel Alameda).  I ordered in Spanish.  It was tasty.  Cocina Griego.  I highly recommend it.
  • I am realizing that things are cheap here.  Really cheap.  Lunch was $5 or so.  I had a gyro with fries.  I added some cheese balls.  And a beer.
  • I am enjoying refining my limited Spanish by reading signs that I know the meaning of.
  • Convenience store and realize that liquor is not really a thing, and Club beer is the local brand.  Or Pilsener.  Pharmacy to get sunblock, which is called Umbrella.  Aye.  Aye.  Aye.
  • We take a nap.  The hotel is the nicest one we will have.  Might as well enjoy.
  • After the nap, we discover heaven.  I have never seen anything like it anywhere.  ANYWHERE.  We heard about a jacuzzi on the top floor.  I go to check it out.  Three different showers, one steam, one cold pool, one lap/swim pool, one steam room (with a window and view), one sauna, one hot tub…I think that is it.  This is all at the top of the tallest building in area and with view of the mountains and immediate city (city is spread out).  The top floor became my heaven for the stay here.
  • Apparently, it gets cloudy and rains every day in Quito.  We had a schedule to keep though.  We could fully skip the cable cars or go check them out in fog.  We chose the latter.  I believe it was called TelefieriCo.
  • We go to the top, can’t see anything but a white wall into the valley, walk around a bit, and then it CLEARS.  We get some great shots of the city and nearby volcanoes before heading down.  Worth the initially cloudy trip. Tora el ciela.  I believe that is “touch the sky.”
  • Linds did dinner research as usual.  She thought she found a keeper, and I was nervous about my first Ecuador meal.  Miskay.  Lots of action outside of it (guarded pockets), but worth the trip.  I took the plunge after some debate.  Guinea pig is a delicacy for inland Ecuador.  We have them as tiny pets as kids, and they grow them ultra-big and eat them.  Sorry.  I ate one.  It was basically bacon tasting.  I tried not to think about the adorable thing I had as a kid.  Anyway, Bruma wine, Locro soup (that is the potato one), guinea pig, and Higos Con Tradicionales as a dessert (cheese, fig, cinnamon ice cream (MAGICAL)). 
  • I have noticed at lunch and now at dinner that you always get a tiny napkin in this country.
  • We are told we have to be walked to a cab since the sun is down.  We accept.  Every cab is $5 or less.
  • It is a hilly town, with LOTS of curves.
  • Lots of religious graffiti.  Some of it is beautiful.
  • They play a lot of popular songs in flute and weird guitar.  Like Titanic theme song with a local twist.
  • They don’t use a decimal point (like Europe), although use the American dollar.  When they were down and out, they switched over to increase value of currency.
  • We are tired.  We hit the Mercure hotel bar, GlobeWalker.
  • Shower, bad Spanish TV, bed.
  • I find out UVA beat Duke.  Cool, but this is so cool too.
  • ESPN is in Spanish on my phone.  When I get it in English, it still only highlights Spanish sports.  I give up. 
  • Screw it.  I am unplugging from society again.
  • I find the bathroom stall downstairs because I am a loving husband and I had a lot of guinea pig.
  • Propina is tip in Spanish.  Important.
  • It is hard for me to tip in Ecuador because A) it is included to a point and B) I used to be a bartender and tip higher, but 15% is way high here, 10% is tops typically.
  • I forgot to take a photo of the sign at the top of the cable car mountain.  13k above sea level.  Almost a 14k in CO.
  • BUT, we are at the equator, and everything is still green and hot at 13K above sea level.
  • Zombie movie and Minority Report only things in English.
  • Hotel has no temperature control.  They control it.  Frustrating, but we will roll with it.
  • Bed.  Even if we had energy, we aren’t supposed to go out at night in this town.
  • Day 3
  • We booked an excursion to Mindo.  If we go back to Ecuador, we WILL go back to Mindo.  They have 100 hotels, some with rooms in the rainforest trees.  Today is ziplining, chocolate farms, and rainforests.
  • Skipping the museums for trip.
  • Cold, clean water tastes good, but you just want ANY temperature of clean water.  So far, so good.
  • We are in a van with two other people, a driver, and a guide.  Tour logistics are two plus hours.
  • I think about how I am still finding it a problem finding hot sauce, whether mainstream out of a bottle or house made hot sauce, which I told you I ask for every time these days.
  • Natalie is our guide.  I find out later it is spelled Nathaly.  Mattias is our driver.
  • I am told there are 24 provinces in Ecuador.
  • I have noticed there are not a lot of traffic lights here.  I am amazed they get from Point A to Point B with so little accidents.
  • We pass by a pickup truck literally FILLED with bananas.  This would be the first of many.
  • We are told that rich and poor can live together seamlessly here.  Kind of like the national version of the Denver Highlands.
  • Military people average about $500/month, and we pass by the big military school.
  • We are riding with Brian in the front who doesn’t talk much but when he does it is about something crazy he did in life.  Amy is in the back with us.  She is very nice, and doesn’t look like someone who just spent days with a personal guide in the Amazon.  Props to her.  She is on the tail end of her trip and said she saw hammerheads, penguins, and armadillos.  We hope to see some of the same.
  • One of the coolest things about this country is that it is less “national” and more regional.  They still have many, many tribes near the volcanoes that are indigenous and do their own thing and keep their own ways.
  • Locro all over the place.
  • We head to see a hummingbird farm first.  A gentleman greets us and apparently he is all about hummingbirds and coffee at this place.
  • We quickly learn that mosquitoes are big and bad here.  Have repellent on you all the time.
  • We are right near Nanelavita outside of Mindo.  Or maybe Nincalita.  The river I believe he said is River Alambi. 
  • As I said, I am not looking up all of this.  Some is accurate, some is inaccurate or misspelled.  I did the best I could with a pen and my trusty piece of yellow legal paper.
  • We eat a fruit.  It is apparently a lemon tangerine mix that is very sour.
  • People wake up at 3-4am and come to Mindo to birdwatch.  Not my thing, but if you like looking through binoculars at flying creatures, than apparently you need to book a trip here.  Bring insect repellent.
  • Mindo comes from Mindotaya, which means to come and change produce.
  • They plant corn on a 45-degree sloped mountain sometimes.
  • Again, as we drive down this curvy, bump road with street tires, I wonder how there aren’t more accidents or cars along the side of the road.
  • Waterfall first.  We take an open cable car over to other side of canyon.  Amazing that this thing works.  Great view.
  • Waterfalls are prominent.  We go to one of them.  15 minutes to get down, and we can tell it will be a long road back up.  One of the only downfalls of entire trip.  We didn’t get to swim at bottom of mountain because it was too rough of water.  Lots of steps to get back up to cable car. 
  • Not sure why we don’t go look at the other 6 waterfalls, but Nathaly is the boss.
  • A black lab follows us down from the other side of the canyon, and bonds with Brian.
  • We do ziplining next.  Four stops, great views, and I should have taken my camera.  I didn’t freak out as much during my honeymoon. 
  • We do La Sazon de Marcelo in downtown Mindo for lunch.  Decent food, we have some chicken soup.  Bones in.  Nothing is disturbing me at this point already.  Brian finds a heart.  They use everything in the animal.
  • I am from Colorado.  I have done lots of chair lifts, but none over a rainforest.  Hundreds of feet up.  I need a carrier for my phone.  I didn’t have the guts to pull it out.  This ride was off the hook, I will tell you.
  • Oddly the black lab was at the top of the three-canyon chair lift ride.  HAD to be the same dog.  Crazy.
  • There are 100 of hotels outside of the small town of Mindo.  Amazing number considering the size of the town.  Some of them have rooms in the trees.  We kept driving by one with a water slide.
  • Mindo is like the Royal Gorge of the rainforest.  Lots of stuff to do.
  • We then go to the butterfly center.  I expected about 10-15 butterflies when the curtain was pulled back. 
  • We get a couple of hundred.  Amazing.
  • Next is the chocolate farm.  Better than I thought it would be.  They use old machines and the info was really cool.  Yumbo’s was the name of the place.  Coco Ariba is only found in Ecuador.  CCN-51 is the other kind.  Ecuador represents 5% of the world’s chocolate.
  • Fruit flies are part of the natural chocolate process, people.  Think about that next time you have a really good candy bar.
  • The candy bar stuff is the weaker, excess chocolate to some degree. 
  • Here is my guide’s info, and I would highly recommend her once this virus stuff clears up.  Nathaly Durand.  0999917674 mahamatayi@hotamil.com
  • At the beginning of the day, there was 1 person with Coronavirus in Guayaquil.  By the end of the day, 6 people had it, but that was his family.
  • Back to Mindo.  More rain, like every day.
  • After you spend a day in Ecuador outside, you basically examine your bug bites and sunburn.
  • We had dinner at Achiote, which ended up being one of the better dinners of the trip.  We also had local music for the first time.  More locro, Club beer, and some skewers.
  • Cabs were less than 5 minutes from hotel, and only $2, but it is still recommended that we take them.
  • We went to the top floor of hotel again to the steam shower playground.  It was off the charts once again.
  • Packing after the steam. 
  • Bedtime.
  • The mind blowing thing about our adventure today was that the prices were: Hummingbird farm was $5, waterfall was $8, ziplining was $8, chair lift was $8, butterflies were $7.50, and Chocolate farm was $8.  What a day.
  • Day 4
  • We head to Otavalo at 8am, a small city a couple hours from Quito with tribal imprints.
  • We get the feeling our hotel experience will be drastically different, and I feel bad for anyone in our group who didn’t take advantage of the top floor steam and hot tub PLAYGROUND.
  • We grab our last substantial breakfast at the hotel restaurant, and even enjoy the Dominican Republic-like hot dogs one more time.  I get an omelet breakfast on the way out also.
  • Alejandro continues to be our guide. His number is 0993470001 or Whats App 593993470001 if you want to enlist his services.
  • Most of our guides say “well” and “please” a lot in their broken Spanish.  Very polite and sincere.
  • He gives us facts on the bus ride. 
  • Well, he city of Quito is 55km long.  Very spread out city.
  • Please, 40% of Quito’s housing illegal, and that means it isn’t built to withstand tremors from the various volcanoes around the city.  They offer a “deal” if you buy a legal house, but many people still go their own way.
  • Well (end of that joke I promise), Quito is dryer by the museum as we draw closer.  The volcano overlooking the city also blocks the rain clouds.
  • We are going to Museum Inti Nan.  This is where we will be at zero latitude.  There is a monstrous statue that was built for that latitude, but apparently they didn’t use GPS and it is wrong.  240m off to be exact.
  • The museum is outside with tents and visual dramatizations.  When we see shade, we grab a spot like hungry wolves.  Some have given up and tie various pieces of clothing all over them in wrong places, as being covered from the sun at this elevation is better than being fashionable.  For example, shirts being used as hats, pullovers covering legs, etc.  Desperation, basically.
  • We enter a tribal tent.  I learn that the actual tribe came down from the mountain to build that exact tent for the museum.  How cool of them.  It IS actually really cool in here.  “Can we just stay in here for the rest of the tour?”  JK.
  • Quito was named as such because it means “middle of the world.”
  • Ecuador has only winter and summer.  It also has day from six to six, and night from six to six.  Exactly, depending on where you are in the country.
  • They have some cool sun dials here at the museum.  They show us how the time and shading is exact.  I feel like watching Raiders of the Lost Ark again suddenly.
  • There are no tornadoes or cyclones in Ecuador, because that would mean that air and water would go one way or the other.
  • We take pictures on the line.  Sounds cheesy until you get there.  Then, it is really cool.  Well, hot, but cool.
  • People try and balance an egg at the line.  Tougher to do than you think.  My wife shows them who is Equator Boss.
  • Guide shows us draining of water at line (straight down), 5 feet north (one way), and 5 feet south (other way).  This zero-latitude thing is cooler than I thought.
  • We finish the latitude thing.  Pretty cool overall.
  • We get a shortened version of the chocolate tour, which we already had the long one of on our tour. 
  • Ecuador is the origination of almost all of cacao.
  • Big companies use cheaper stuff and excess.  I knew that already.  Ha!
  • We have a beer that is called Cero given the latitude.  Nice topper to a hot museum tour.  I buy a cheap sticker for my work PC.  Need something.  Not much of a souvenir guy.
  • Lindsey gets her egg certificate.  She was able to balance it, I wasn’t.  No certificate for me this trip.
  • They gave out passport stamps, but I don’t feel like going to bus.  Lindsey gets the stamp on her fancy egg balancing certificate.
  • We learn more stuff back on the bus.
  • Guinea Pigs are called Cuy, and that is because it is the sound they make.  We know them as the tiny pets we had as a kid, but they breed them a little larger on ranches in Ecuador.
  • The 90th Parallel is apparently the Galapagos Islands, if we are talking meridian west or something like that.  Point is, for all of the cool stuff that happens and has happened there, it makes sense it is part of lore.
  • There have been two conquistadors in Ecuador history:  the Incas and the Spaniards.  Different tribes and cities embraced or dissed their past culture as they saw fit.
  • Bananas exported are “plain.”  They are called, in some places, lady fingers here and they prefer the overripe ones.
  • From what I have gathered, the biggest products the company exports are cacao, bananas, shrimp, tuna fish, and…
  • Panama Hats.  You might think they are from Panama, but they are from Ecuador…and…
  • I know.  I repeated myself.  Lots to say.  Sorry.
  • ROSES.  They are third globally behind only Columbia and Kenya in exporting of these flowers.  They ship them in pink, white, yellow, and red.  There are endless white caverns of greenhouses on the way from Quito to Otavalo that almost become beautiful on the mountain slopes as nature’s creations.  You know the prices we pay for roses outside of Ecuador.  IN Ecuador, you can get 25 roses for $2.
  • Most places will serve tuna to some degree.  Also, JUICE is a biggie here.  It tastes better.  It tastes like pizza in Chicago or a cheesesteak on South Street.  I had blackberry juice at the next meal after these facts, and had it every single time they had it moving forward in trip.  I even had a bartender make us a vodka drink with it, because it was so good.
  • Lots of Agave plants are grown in this region, but it is not used for tequila.
  • I have noticed there are lots of buildings and signs for Jerusalem, San Francisco, and San Antonio.
  • Every small city is separated by Colorado like mountains.  I forget we ARE in the Andes.  Anyway, I am taking frequent pics through bus window or the bus driver is stopping.  Problem is, these are two lane roads, so if you stop, you have to pass people again.
  • The two active volcanoes are Kayumbi and Cotipaxi.  You can see them from various areas in the mountains, and they are very superstitious about these guys.
  • More roses and greenhouses (with white roofs)
  • Volcanic soil is the best for roses, it turns out.  First, Columbia, and then Ecuador.
  • Quito Airport actually looks new because of all of the roses they sell.  They can make it look pretty AND upgrade it with rose money.
  • $400/month is minimum wage for Ecuador.  $280/month is for Columbia.  $5/month is Venezuela.  Therefore, you can imagine that there are lots of Columbians and Venezuela people in the country.
  • $700/month is considered the dividing line for middle class.
  • Lake Otavalo is right by San Pablo.
  • Roses are primarily grown in a small town called Tobakambo.
  • We stopped by a place in between towns called Mira Lago Café.  It had fantastic volcano and lake views while we were eating.  More potato soup, chicken, blackberry juice, and ice cream.  Again, dinner is not very important in Ecuador.  It is somewhat about breakfast, but all about lunch when the rubber hits the road.
  • The bathrooms were divided up “Kari” for guys and “Warmi” for girls.
  • Two locals jump on the bus, and they are in tribal outfits.  Both young girls.
  • We learn that if the knot on the dress pullover is on the shoulder, it means they are single, and in front, means they are married.
  • Their tribe is the wealthiest of tribes because they work hard.  At a very young age, and very early in time, they travel out to sell what they make, making them successful and well-spread out.  They apparently are the go-getters of tribes.
  • Back to their hometown near volcano and town.  Otavalo, and briefly the metropolis it was.
  • Wait.  Another stop.  Coticachi.  Alejandro talks about how busy summer solstice is and Chicha the drink.  But, also how this town is the leather town.  They have plenty of it, because the tribe and country, early on, assigned each city with a responsibility.  This town’s was leather.  It was assigned 120 years ago.
  • I looked for some good unique bracelets, but it was mostly mainstream stuff.  But, still amazing how much leather they had.
  • We went to the main square.  They like town squares down here.
  • Linds got a coffee drink at Café Rio, where it supposedly was some of the best.  Not Elf World’s Best Coffee, but like really the best.  I wouldn’t be able to tell.  I despise coffee.
  • I had gelato at the recommended place, Incanto.  Delicious.
  • I had some communication skills when not with Linds.  English not much spoken around here.
  • Meet at bus and on to next stop.
  • We next go down the road to Reguche.  This is where a famous family made textiles and would sing us Andean music.
  • We are told some options for the next day are volcano, waterfalls, and a condor park.
  • They actually BUILD a flute in front of us, and play a song with it.  He also plays a guitar made from an armadillo shell.  This is amazing stuff to watch them play from their hearts on instruments made from nature.  We are novices and nothing in what we do with manmade stuff.
  • We check into our hotel for the next two nights.  Indio Inn.
  • Sisi and Donja Ester are given as dinner ideas from Alejandro.
  • Indio Inn is on another Simon Bolivar street.  Pretty popular guy down here.
  • Indio Inn has two cool courtyards.  No A/C.  No pool.  There is a vent above our shower.  It is just an opening.  Probably insects galore up there.  We don’t look.  As Alejandro said on the bus before we got here, our next hotel would be very “different.”  Yup.
  • We do Sisa for dinner.  They have two types of beers on the entire beer and cocktail list.  Everywhere else is closed though.  I have had enough of adapting for a couple of days.  They have a pasta with three cheeses.  I bite and order it.  It was exactly like I would have made myself at home after a long night.
  • We are joined by Brie and Bruce, our initial buddies in the first meet.  Bruce reminds me of an ex-co-worker I had named Ponto and Lindsey’s dad, Steve…combo.  Brie reminds us both of Alexa, a friend of ours.
  • I am noticing the tiny napkin trend no matter which city we are in.
  • Home to hotel and bed.
  • This hotel has the classic foreign country rule.  All things, even toilet paper with poop wiped, goes INTO the trash can.  Not in the toilet.  Plumbing can’t handle it.  I am uncomfortable doing this, but play the game, as it will be like this in the islands too.
  • Day 5
  • The day started with me confirming about the toilet paper situation.  Yes, put it in the wastebasket.  So uncomfortable of a system.
  • We eat breakfast at the hotel.  More popular music played by local flutes.  Fruit, juice, eggs, bread, butter.
  • Today is market day.  We meet him at 830am to go to “big” market.  Apparently, it is one of the largest in the country.
  • Kichwa is the language they speak, and this is the Quechua dialect spoken in this region of Ecuador.
  • We go to the town square, which is right at the end of Simon Bolivar Avenue.  A big statue of Ruminawi is there.  He is the guy who was in charge of hiding the treasure.  I guess he got a statue because he was very good at his job, as the treasure still has not been found.  But he got his statue.
  • We get to the market, and Alejandro doesn’t say largest in the country…he says world.  I will say it is pretty darn big.  Think of an arena being hollowed out and filled with floors of goods instead of having a basketball court.  That big.
  • The market is the heart of the city, not the town square in Otavalo.
  • I believe he said it is 30 years old.  It is closed these days and not open…something about the cost of land.
  • There is a huge bananas row.  Also a potato row. 
  • I see a women’s outfit row.  AN outfit actually costs $300, which is out of whack for everything else being cheap.  Same outfit as the locals who got on our bus.
  • It costs $5/ month to rent a space at the market.
  • 3am is the busiest time at the market, because everyone is bringing their stuff in.
  • There is a food court area.  I see a bunch of people having locro/potato soup before heading off to work.
  • I see some almost real looking pigs you can have cooked.
  • There is a vegetable row,  which isn’t much different than our grocery vegetable areas.
  • Fish/shrimp row.  Told you.  Shrimp is huge here.  Tuna fish too.
  • There is a dry row of sugar and flour and seeds and stuff, along with a corn row…for corn.
  • Bruce, our group member, goes on a spending spree.
  • Alejandro shows us the rose area.  Not as large as I expected for here, but the four colors are here and the price is cheap, like he said.  The roses are beautiful, like they had been picked right down the road in a big white greenhouse.
  • They sell roses in groups of 25, where we sell roses in groups of 12.
  • We see the gross meat row, where all kinds of small animals are hanging out.  I went through the Euro market in Barcelona, so that was more overwhelming for me than this actually.
  • Water costs $8/ month, Alejandro tells us personal utility stuff.
  • I get yelled at for taking a photo of wall graffiti, and I am told that some is government sponsored and some is personal.  We still never figured out what he was made about.
  • We then head to the “craft market.”  This is back towards the hotel about 4 blocks from the hotel.  On Saturdays, it is apparently 9 blocks around.  Today, it is just a block.  I find the stuff pretty cool inside, but it is the hustler/ negotiation mentality.  If they just left me alone for 5 minutes, I would buy a bracelet.  I leave with nothing.  I can’t take the haggling.  I hate salespeople lol.  I have decided that I love these home/ tribal bracelets, but I don’t like ones I need to tie myself.  I need a latch or knot or something.
  • We are given some lunch ideas. 
  • La Coscha Coffee.  Probably not for us. 
  • Some other place caddy corner I didn’t write down.  We are also given ideas for afternoon.  The volcano (Cuicocha?) would be a $12 ride, $10 to wait, and $12 back.  The Condor Park was at 12 and 3pm, but was oddly closed for today.  The waterfall was close.  $5 taxi, taxis waiting outside. 
  • Alejandro said he recommends Deton repellent for these badass mosquitoes.
  • We hit a shop or two and decided to take a quick nap before lunch.
  • We went to the recommendations for lunch.  They were closed.  We improvised and hit Mi Otavalita.  One of our better meals.  Blackberry juice (again, and the best yet), these odd delicious corn nuts, she had beef, and I had chicken.  Little slow of services like is usual here so far, but we recommended the place to others in our group.  We get one singular tiny napkin for the meal.
  • We hit the waterfall.  Totally worth it.  You get dropped by a cute little one street town and then head up to see a gorgeous waterfall.  Pics with llamas on the way.  Two different spots to see it.  Sandals were fine for the walk.  Waterfalls are so dope.
  • We hit the grocery store.  Found some coca leaves, a local breathing thing, and found some brand name Skyy Vodka.  We buy some Malbec and sliced cheese to have a pre-dinner wine and cheese party in one of our hotel courtyards.  What a cute idea by Lindsey.
  • The Malbec worked out great.  The cheese tasted like plastic, and I will eat any cheese.  Not this one.  We had a wine and wine party.
  • Alejandro hosts a fruit tasting.  Dragon fruit, passion fruit, bananas, papaya, guac, etc.  Delicious.
  • We are reminded that the Galapagos Islands needs $22 and $100 all upfront to even get onto the island group.
  • We are given the long itinerary of the next day, with travel involved.  Sounds fun.  Turtles.
  • There is a cancellation on the massage table from a group member.  We get the word.  $35 a head for a couples one.  That is cheap as heck.  We accept.  We get one that charges $100 in the States.
  • We catch a late bite where some others in our group went.  Arbol de Montalvo Pizza.  Another singular tiny napkin.  The pizza was ok.  We were really hungry, so that probably upped the quality.  But, it definitely wasn’t bad if you are in the small town and really need pizza.
  • We hear about other people having flight problems the night before.
  • We hear Elton John in Spanish at the pizza place.  Pequeno balle or something…
  • My ESPN is in Spanish again.  It is back and forth and tough to figure out, and limited WIFI to fix.
  • We walk through he town square one more time.
  • Home, pack, bed.
  • We hope the next bed is bigger, and cherish our white noise apps on our phone.  Can’t exactly leave the windows open in this place unless you want to get eaten.
  • Interesting.  Alejandro oddly said the mosquitoes come out exactly at 6pm each night.  I think he was spot on for our stay.  Not 530.  Not 545.  6pm.
  • Day 6
  • It was previously a 630am meet time, but now a 730am meet time.  We catch breakfast, the one we would be eating on the bus.  Bread with a small piece of cheese, pretty decent juice, and some eggs.  Enough for now.  It seems to be on a Ecuador flute Michael Jackson montage.
  • I try and not take the same pictures on the way to Quito again, although it is all pretty.  I still take some on my way to 1300 plus pictures.
  • More of curvy roads, double line passing, and everyone amazingly missing everyone else using same methods.
  • We check our $120 each to get in there.  We have been told this is very important.
  • Alejandro guides us up to security and says goodbye.  Adios, sir.  Been a pleasure.  He was a great guide.
  • The wallet ninja is flagged again by their version of TSA.  Well, I assume it was that.  I found it scarily easy to just pull that out and say that was the problem.  Moving on…
  • Ecuador, although cheap thus far, as airport prices ALSO.  Club is $4.50 here suddenly after being $2 or $2.50.  AIRPORTS!!
  • We eat at the Guacamole Grill.  I have a ham and cheese sandwich, while Lindsey gets some locro.  We each get a tiny napkin.
  • I have given up asking for sauces out of country.  I tolerate ketchup and mayonnaise for the meal.  I am pretty sure a pregunta about “Aioli” would throw fits to this place.
  • My wife amazingly is more relaxed in an international airport than a domestic one.  Not sure how, but we relax and eat our food.
  • We head through security and I am surprised to find out it is a normal size plane to the islands.  I expected a puddle jumper.  Yet, I didn’t really know how big these islands were in reality, so I had no foundation for a guess.
  • Today is turtles, Darwin center, lava tunnels.
  • Seats in Ecuador, for some reason, are ABC and JKL.  I never asked why.
  • The Galapagos Islands are 600 km from the main cities, about two hours in the air.
  • The interior of the plane is sprayed as we get close to the islands.  Apparently, this guards against any new ecosystems getting introduced to the islands by some really smart but obnoxious nature guy who was in the mood for globe altering jokes.
  • The airport has three wind energy things, and has a runway where we head back DOWN the one runway to get to the terminal.
  • A yellow tag put on your bag at other airport makes sure nothing is opened between then and now.  A tired looking dog climbs on the bags before we can grab them.
  • First stop is Baltra.  Not sure what that means.  I must have that out of order in my notes.
  • Wait.  I Googled it.  That is the first island you head to.
  • Success.  Exoticca is there for us as we leave with our bags.
  • I whip out my excursion backpack, which I am now an expert in packing with waterproof gear, insect repellent, sunscreen, and other survival items.
  • The bus takes us to a small boat, where we are taken to the port part of Santa Cruz.  Very blue water in this in between part.  As if we doubted our introduction into vast nature, a sea lion greets us at the ramp to the port.  He will be there to say goodbye in a few days also.
  • We get rid of suitcases, and get on new bus.  Our luggage is put in the back of a pickup truck, which would normally make one nervous, but what is to fear at this part in the trip?
  • Jose and Carmina are new guides, along with Luis the driver.
  • On Santa Cruz, one of the larger islands in the Galapagos, the south side is rainy and the north side is dry.
  • We pass through the rainy elevated part.  Trees called Scalacias (?) are the largest tree in the dandelion family and are only here…like that good old Darwin Finch.  This is in the highest part, which is 1500 ft above sea level.
  • We go through Santa Rosa, a lower farming area.
  • We arrive near the tortoise reserve and are told to start looking.  This is part public and part private, with a barbed wired fence separating them high enough so the tortoises can pass through to where they want.
  • They like mud, so we are supposed to look there.
  • We put boots on and find two right off the bat.  BIG ones.  We get lots of pics.  As long as you approach them from behind, they don’t seem to care (which is inverted to me personally).
  • They like to lay eggs 200 ft or more above sea level.  They like it here, because it is always cloudy and muddy.
  • The tortoises eat 42 species of plant.
  • They can survive 1 year without food, and 6 months without water.
  • More rings?  Younger (inverted I would think).  No rings?  Female.  No rings when young?  Because you can’t tell gender yet.  Tail?  Male.
  • They used to be kept on pirates’ boats because they didn’t have to eat, and they could eat them later on.  This is sad.
  • They like lower levels.  We see three of them in a lower pond in the highlands.
  • Their digestion cycle is 2-3 weeks.  Because of this long cycle and their love of various plants, they help to spread species throughout the part of the island.
  • The islands were formed by a hot spot.  This is friction of different plates.
  • We go into a lava tunnel.  Galapagos Islands are active volcanoes like Ecuador.  This is the second iteration of the islands, or something like that.  Apellagio?  Whatever…moving on.
  • We go through town and end up at the Darwin Center.  I didn’t expect this sweet walking street to be part of this, but this might end up being a fun town.
  • We are the last group to go through the baby tortoise exhibit.  We see Lonesome George on the way in.  They tell the story about the tortoise who didn’t have anyone to do it with.  1902 was apparently last time other photos were taken.
  • Lonesome George died in 2012.  They took him to a taxidermist, and used everything from his body in the recreation.
  • We learn about baby tortoises.  It is 20-30 years before you can tell gender.
  • Females prefer higher temperature, males prefer lower temps.
  • After two years of being babies, they go to the “school” cage, where they start looking like grownups a little.
  • They have to get them NOT used to human support.
  • They have graduated 18 in 30 years.
  • Galapagos is named after “galloping,” and this comes from scientist talking about galloping and also the shape of the island.
  • Saddlebacks need to reach for food, and Dome tortoises get food on ground.
  • They thought they were extinct, but then found a bunch at Flotiana (?).
  • (I don’t have time to look all of this stuff up.  I just have the notes for later use)
  • We go to Hotel Albatross (which they almost didn’t give us a ride to).  Not a bad looking lobby.  We meet Edgar, our new guide.  I grab my paper map.  This turns out useless since there are mainly two roads in whole town.
  • Edgar talks about Quiosco, Binford Street, where the locals put chairs in the street.  He doesn’t think our stomachs will tolerate it very well.  I plan on listening to him.
  • He recommends Frit Frat (which I wrote down), but it ends up being Fra Fre.
  • He recommends the fish cleanings at the marina between 4-6pm, where sea lions, pelicans, etc. try to steal fishermen’s pulls from the day.
  • We are starving listening to his ramble, but it is a must.  It has been eight hours since we last ate.
  • The rules of the island:  don’t touch, don’t feed, no flash camera, and keep 2m between you and the animals.  Amazing that these rules would become important.
  • He recommends Darwin center, watching sharks at the other marina, and Tortuga Bay, where there is a rough beach and a calm beach ten minutes further.  Water taxi or long walk to Tortuga.
  • Apparently, the rain today at this part of the island was only the second time this month.
  • Alemanes Beach/ German Beach is another recommendation.
  • He gives us the relative schedule for the next few days, and goes over who is doing what tour/excursion.  I just hear that breakfast is from 630-9am.  On Friday, we are doing shark watching, snorkeling 1, snorkeling 2, hiking to a beach with dog crabs, and then back at 1230.  Sounds like a full morning.
  • 930am Sunday flight to Guayaquil.
  • Gives us his numbers.  0983181741, WA 593983181741
  • Darwin Street, he says, is cool but still touristy and pricey.
  • We try to book an excursion for next day, but Bartolome (Lindsey’s choice as I had no opinion and as usual would do whatever) is full.
  • We head to dinner.  We find Fra Fre.  It is short for Frank and Fred, and now the world makes sense.
  • She has octopus, I have rosemary whitefish.  The ceviche is some of the best ever, and it has tiger milk, whitefish, and shrimp. I have a Club beer, she has a capinrha.  We get some hot sauce and cream sauce.  We both get a tiny napkin, so at least that remains the same.  Owners come over and take pictures with us.
  • The taxis in this town are ONLY white four-seater Nissan pickups.  SO weird and random.
  • No.  Seriously.  The entire town is four door white Nissan pickups.  Like San Pedro is all golf carts.
  • More flute version of popular songs at this place.
  • We hit the local Bongo Bar, which has 2 for 1 cocktails.  We sign up for pool and are the only name, but they successfully ignore us and we lose interest.  We head home for night.
  • We go down mosquito alley, which is the hallway to our room before I use a large amount of insect repellent on it 5 entrances in.  We watch 21 Jump Street in Spanish.  My wife figures out the WIFI, although it really doesn’t work.  We watch Impractical Jokers in Spanish.  Those are even funnier guys when I don’t know what they are saying!  Tomorrow is an open day we will use for beaches.  We have a king bed.  We have A/C.  Things are glorious.
  • Day 7
  • No excursion today, so it is BEACH day!  Just the island of Santa Cruz and us.
  • Hotel Albatross has a relatively normal breakfast.  I got my eggs.  I got some fruit.  I got some juice.  I am happy.
  • We eat.  We walk to marina to scout out two of my favorite words in the English language “water taxi.”
  • It is a 2-minute ride, but only $.80 to get there.  That is fair.
  • On the way, we lock in a Bartolome ticket.  Very expensive for a day tour.  But, because of wildlife, they only send THREE boats total to the island each day.  So, basically, they send like 36 people to the place.  We are in.
  • We go over to Playa de Las Alamanas.  We have the beach to ourselves, which is badass.  We see a marine iguana and sting ray immediately.  It is cloudy snorkeling though.  We try though.
  • People then come.  On the beach, and some jackass says he sees an octopus where we were swimming.  Liar.  Anyway, this beach gives us the best idea of the trip here.
  • We are right by Finch Bay Hotel.  Lindsey does her thing.  #1 on trip advisor.  We book a dinner reservation for tomorrow, after thinking about doing a lunch in our swim trunks.
  • We were going to head back to hotel, but decide, since I have my trusty backpack full of everything we could possibly need, to just buy a ticket to Tortuga Bay.  Fine print Edgar didn’t tell us.  The Tortuga Bay boat runs on a schedule, twice a day, not as a water taxi where you can just say “go farther.”  Anyway, the timing works on way back but not on way there.  We will walk.  So, we buy a return ticket, walk to where people eat on the street at night (Binsford Ave), hang a left, and venture on this 45-minute walk.  In the sun.  No joke.  The first 15 minutes of it are switchbacks like on a Colorado mountain…in equator sun and heat.
  • We get to the top.  Refill for water and toilet.  Then, the 30-minute walk on a path (resting in shade whenever it is offered) until you HEAR the payoff.  Worth it.  The “rough beach.”  It is beautiful.  You aren’t supposed to swim in it, but we take pics and walk towards the “calm beach.”  More than 10 minutes, by the way.  We walk fast, and it was 15.  Anyway, there is a lagoon on the left before going over to the calm part.  We get there.  A minute walk.  It is cloudier.  We swim for a bit, I test my Spanish by asking where the boat picks us up in 45 minutes, and I have the great idea of going back to the lagoon part.  We go.  Brilliant.  We swim in blue water, snorkel and can see everything, watch pelicans dive all around us, and have a great last 15 minutes.  Back to the path to the boat.  Back to home base marina.
  • Lunch time.  Linds has already researched this.  Almar is the choice, and that is by the Darwin Center, where we learned about baby tortoises.
  • On the way, we learn in passing about this awesome pool on the water that allows you to spend $25 each and use the Infinity pool with a view between 12-5pm.  Hmmm…
  • We have lunch on the water.  Sea lions live ON the dock where we sit.  They play in front of us.  Marine iguanas are all around us.  We see an albatross above and orange crabs below.  Beautiful.  I decide to fold and just get a prosciutto sandwich.  She gets a Tortuga Bay Salad.  We have blackberry juice again, and it might be the best yet.  We destroy a couple bottles of water.  We get a big napkin, which, as you can see, I noted in my notes.  Mind Blowing.
  • By the way, crabs are tough to find here.  The ones located here are illegal to eat.  So, basically they either have to find different crabs for you to eat, or ship them in, I guess.
  • Overall, the water here in the harbor and everywhere is MUCH more blue than I expected.
  • We need to come back, we decide.  We need to dive (asthma for her, ear problems for me), visit the other big islands such as Isabella and San Cristobal, and stay at a different hotel.  So much to do here!
  • I have a note that says “this is now hot, like equator hot.”
  • The drinks get hot while you are eating a quick meal.  Not warm, but hot.
  • We walk back towards our hotel.  Not lying.  I had my first bathroom breakdown (only one of whole trip lasted one-hour total of pain and multiple trips), it was hot, and we did that Hotel Solymar deal.  Brilliant.  I think we planned it in our subconscious anyway.
  • We swim, drink, eat, and watch wildlife just come to us.  Spotted eagle rays, sea lions, manta rays, pelicans, etc.  What an excellent afternoon.
  • I did notice during this trip that taxes are 22%.  Wow.
  • This is the place we connected the dots and we both had a vodka with the delicious blackberry juice we had been having.  Awesome idea.
  • My only troublesome part of this afternoon was that it seemed like Natalie Imbruglia and Sarah Mcglachan (NOT looking up the spelling of HER name) were singing the hits.  That is ok even if they are the devil to my ears.  The view and wildlife overrode these chumps.
  • No nap today.  The WIFI at this hotel was much better than ours, so my wife was happy and getting sun.
  • Cab back to hotel…because we were feeling LAZY.
  • Off to the fish cleaning thing after a shower. 
  • We get in nice clothes so we can immediately begin sweating after leaving the hotel room.  For 5 minutes, we both look stunning.
  • We oddly get the same taxi driver as last time.  That was like two hours ago.  What are the odds?  Are there hundreds of cabs or 10’s?  How big of coincidence IS this?
  • We were late and missed the fish cleaning.  I guess their way of life can’t be dictated by our selfish needs.  Dammit.
  • We jump in another water taxi to Finch Bay Restaurant for our fancy dinner.
  • We get to restaurant in nice clothes and drenched with sweat.  But, we are the only ones there.  When I do fancy, Linds knows I am not afraid to confront my fears and DO it, man.  We do chef’s selections on both food and wine, even though I am not a mature eater nor wine drinker.  I am all in.  When in Rome.  Or Ecuador.
  • I have decided at this point that insect repellent is sort of like a perfume or cologne in this region of the world.
  • This is what we had.  Chef’s selection is Santana Amber, and wine selection is Shaiterika.  The Bread Basket was awesome.  The Beginning was the app of the day, and whatever it was I approve.  Morando Sav Blanc with it.  Natural Flavors was Coconut Shrimp with Lemongrass Soup, and Baron Phillipe wine on side.  Our Essence was fish in coconut sauce with Chardonnay.  We don’t dig Chardonnay, but it was good still.  The Experience was tuna in sesame wafer with Moranda Rose.  Seanergy was octopus in chicken puree with Moranda Merlot.  Yes, I ate some octopus.  It was good.  Just can’t take the texture for a full dish.  The Tradition was pork in a tangy vinaigrette sauce with a San Felipe Malbec.  Off the hook.  Sweet Galapagos was chocolate in Palo Santo sauce with cava, and a sorbet cleanse. 
  • Many random, nonsense things written on boat ride back to home base.  “Connie, Mom, Pool, Bongo doesn’t mean next, people watching, lizard watching, forgot to make bets, hotel solymar.”  Actually, all of those but two make perfect sense.
  • We watch a bug getting eaten by a lizard.
  • We drove by a place called Darwin Lounge on the first day.  It is closed again.  What a tease.  I wanted to be a regular there.  But, instead, I had to evolve.  Lol.
  • We buy vodka, Gatorade, and Club beer on way home.
  • Back to hotel.  We see Kelly and Tracy, who are our favorite people on trip aside from Scott and Jen.  Or maybe they are tied.
  • Hotel A/C is kicking when we return.  Good.  The Equator is very hot.
  • We watch Tom and Jerry in Spanish.
  • Flintstones in Spanish.
  • Heat in Spanish.  Awesome.  Still a great gun scene in either language.
  • Gatorade Apple Ice is not a flavor I will go back to, but options were limited.
  • We then go to bed.
  • Day 8
  • This morning is all about the scheduled group tour. 
  • 8am breakfast with fruit juice, eggs, fruit, and bread.
  • Taxi to boat
  • Our guide is Eddie, captain is Troublemaker, Johann or something like that is ships mate
  • Shows us mango trees by harbor-apparently tough to get.
  • The point by marina is Unger Mayer Point.
  • We pass National Geographic boat.  It is large, and I want a trip on it at some point.
  • Animals we see today:  marine iguana, sea lion, eagle ray, blue footed boobies, reef shark, dog crabs, flamingos, snake, finches, baby shark, sea turtles, Brown Norie, Pelican, etc.
  • We go first to Sea Lion Island/Commanuel Island.  We initially just see one sea lion, but catch 3 more later in the viewing.  We see research equipment on beach.  We can’t swim today though, as the current is too rough.
  • We next head to Santa Cruz Island again, Estrala Point.  Here, the heat is insane.  I wish the guides would build an awning or something to talk to us under.  Today, we just brave it out in the sun.  We cross a cool creek looking inlet on a bridge/stairs.  We walk about 3-4 minutes and end up at Tintoleras, where reef sharks “rest” between hunting at night.  We listen and look down.  There are a LOT of sharks down there, 20 feet away.  Pretty stellar. 
  • Next, we hike about 10 minutes, all in the sun, to Dog Crab Beach.  Playa de los Perros.  This was a cool, volcano rock filled pretty beach.  Well, a rock beach.  We only see a few crabs this time, but get the history of the beach, and learn how marine iguanas became “marine.”
  • We snorkel.  Decent visibility.  We swim pretty close to a couple of sea turtles (one of them laying a perfect water shit), reef sharks, sea lions, and various other fish.  I become a little jealous of Bruce Larsen’s GoPro, as he got some pretty cool pics of the animals and us.  He would outdo himself scuba diving the next day.
  • Bruce tells me today on the boat that he initially thought HE had ugly feet before looking at mine.  I concur.  Old news.  I win ugly feet contests every single time.
  • Next stop is Las Grietas.  We walk by a cool lava field and in the sun for about 10 minutes.  The reward is worth it.  It is a crack in the rocks with frigid, refreshing water to snorkel and swim in.  Linds and I wear our shoes, because of course my wife wants to go until it ends, which ends up being after another two pools separated with rocks.  Great swim.  I want to soak up the sun after, but a family of monster Ecuador hornets accelerates my gathering of our things.  Slightly running.  Out of there.
  • I feel like there are no international swimming rules every time I go to one of these cracks, pools, waterfalls, etc.  Kids were climbing all over us the whole time.
  • I find out during this time, after a slight heart attack, that of COURSE my flip flops float…silly.  Still a minor heart attack.
  • We have a beer and wine while waiting for the others at one of those cool bars in the middle of nowhere.  It was delicious.  The others come too soon.
  • Boat back to home base.  End of group tour.
  • We go to the deli, which oddly is highly ranked in Yelp.  My wife knows this.  She gets mushroom salad and mushroom pizza, which is kind of rude if I wanted a piece (or a safety net for that).  I get the fish and chips, because it is a staple of theirs.  They have hot sauce amazingly.  We all get one tin napkin each.  Linds and I get the blackberry juice again, and it is magical…again.  Food was good, fans were on, cookies were good, gelato was stellar.  Healthy meal for all of us.  We had the meal with Scott and Jen, who will join us for a beach run a taxi driver sold us on.
  • We head to Playa de Garacaterra.  Beach was beautiful.  Those deer flies are more vicious out here it seems.  Water was too cloudy for snorkeling, but definitely still worth 20 minute drive.  Plus, we get to see a flamingo in the wild.  Lagoon 2 minute walk away.  WORTH it.
  • We paid the $10/hr rate to have the cab driver wait for us.  That is a thing here.
  • We head back and ask to get dropped at wharf to catch this fish cleaning thing people tell us about.
  • We walk by, again, another volleyball draft.  They are very serious about this sport in this town.
  • We grab a beer at Santa Fe Brewery and I finally have an IPA on this trip.  Wait.  That is a lie.  I had one at the bar after the crack swimming.  Forgot.  Great view at this place.  I ask about a drifit, but they don’t have any clothes right now.  I get a sticker and coaster.
  • We don’t buy anything shopping, but I start making the buy list for people for later.
  • We walk down Charles Binford during the day.  This is the on street eating dinner place.  Anyway, we grab a mojito at TJ’s.
  • We get a reservation for later at Bahia Mar, another place she is dying to try.
  • We head back and hop in the pool.  Shower up, get in nicer clothes to sweat through, and head to Bahia Mar.  We wait for a cab and order a happy hour mojito.  It takes them like 10 minutes to make it.  I wonder if they were distracting me from the cab wait.
  • They are out of lobster, so my risotto idea is out.  I end up getting a steak with shrimp sauce, she gets shrimp cordon bleu with octopus.  We have a raw tuna appetizer so I can get my seafood in though.  The steak was so big I couldn’t even finish it.
  • We get some pics, and head out.
  • I remind myself of my international rules of travel.  Always use bathroom if one is around, always take free water, and always make change for big bills if you can.
  • I talk to my wife again about always starting a panoramic video and not telling me she is live, so I always ruin the end of it by saying something dumb.
  • After dinner, we watch a traditional dance downtown.  Lots of locals, lots of dancers, pretty cool.
  • We knock out the rest of the shopping, and I grab a volcanic bead bracelet.  And a Drifit with Spanish on it.
  • Every store and every restaurant has a fire alarm where they have not changed the batteries.
  • We have a drink at Camino Del Sol Brewery and head home.
  • I have various notes about what we watched that night in Spanish.  Rocky, Ali, Nicholas Cage, Indiana Jones, etc.
  • I keep forgetting to mention the NAME of the town we are in.  Puerto Ayora.
  • Day 9
  • Today is Bartolome Day.  550am meet time.  No breakfast.  We get it on board apparently.
  • We drive 45 minutes back to the port again…other side of the island.  We get a big van this time.  It is Scott, Jen, Tracy, Kelly, Linds, and I from our group.  Rest of the people are different.
  • Quick boat ride to NICE boat, and our boat for the day.  For what we paid for this tour, I was expecting a nice boat.  Not new or anything, but lots of cool compartments, lots of space, places to hide, places to lay down, and lots of personality.
  • Breakfast is off the hook and served to us.  Stuff for egg sandwich, yogurt, granola and fruit.  I almost start eating other stuff before they bring the EGGS.
  • Two-hour ride.  Full of trying to spot wildlife, taking pics of islands, and NAPS.
  • We get close to Santiago Island after passing the legendary Pinnacle Rock, which we will get closer to later.  Boat anchors, they take us to shore, we learn some volcano stuff, and then we snorkel.  No hammerheads today to swim with unfortunately.  That is really what I wanted to do.  But, we get some cool fish, an octopus, turtles, etc.  This is not a ZOO.  We can’t assume everything is out all the time.
  • The sun has gotten the best of/earned the respect of everyone at this point.  I notice that every single snorkeler (except for my wife) is swimming with a shirt on.  Equator Respect.
  • Then, we head to Bartolome.  We have sea lions greet us at the stairs.
  • Our guide points where we are going.  All the way to the top.  In the sun.  No shade.  Wow.  Ok.  My wife tells me it is 365 actual steps, and I decide later that doesn’t include the non-step inclines.
  • I learn there are NO fresh water lakes or rivers anywhere in the islands.
  • Last eruption was in 1886…but tremors every day.
  • Plenty of cool lava fields as we walk up.  It basically looks like the moon, to cut to the chase.
  • Oh, how rude of me.  Our guides are Edwin, Julio Cesar, and Captain Cook.  Name of boat was Yate Queen Karen.
  • We climb to the top.  A big orange buoy is at the top.  Lots of pics before heading down.  I have busted out my all surrounding, non-fashionable hat for the way down.  Desperate measures.
  • We have new people on this tour, and I get the feeling that everyone here is from Canada.
  • Back to boat.  Lunch is served.  Chicken, rice, pasta salad (kind of like I make amazingly (vinaigrette and pasta lol)), salad, and POUNDCAKE (makes me hum Van Halen for a while after).
  • I find it interesting on trips like this as to what is decided is the “internationally accepted meal.”
  • We try one more time to see some penguins, but no luck.  So, Linds and I have seen every animal we wanted to see except penguins and hammerheads.  We got lucky with the flamingo apparently, as people have been here for months and not seen them.
  • There is ONE single tree on all of Bartolome.  Trust me, after seeing it, I was looking for a second one.
  • If volcanoes erupt again, it might combine islands.
  • My wife always swims ahead of me in every situation.  I just try and keep up.
  • During snorkeling, I watched Edwin free dive down 30 feet to bottom, swim along bottom for a minute, and then come back up.  Amazing.
  • The lava underwater today looked like a painting to me.  Surreal.
  • I need to buy a GoPro for next trip like this.
  • We see dolphins from afar on the way back.  It looked like they were putting on a synchronized swimming show for us.  They were mating apparently, so they didn’t come play in front of our boat.  Actually, EVERYTHING was mating apparently, so had less time for us to a degree.  Still a lot though.
  • It took a LOT longer to get back.  Sure, it could be wind or tide.  I think they were dragging it out a bit lol.
  • Our greeting sea lion was there again as we got back to home base.  Not as cool now that we were leaving tomorrow.
  • Back to home.  Shower to sweat again.
  • We went to Anker, at the end of Binford Street.  This place was a more local flavor, and not by the water.  They had really cool music in the background.  Oddly, in the middle of the meal though, they played Anoth One Bites The Dust.  Local stuff mostly though.  Only 4 real options for dinner, but you had a feeling they would be good.
  • The bread with some sort of green stuff was delicious and I wanted more.  We had ceviche which was served with popcorn.  Interesting and good.  Linds had the catch of the day, a swordfish.  I had the chicken risotto, which was the special of the day.  It might have been one of the best bites of chicken I have ever had.  Seriously.  She had a spicy cocktail, I had a local brew, the Reptilia (sort of like a Dale’s Pale Ale).
  • The taxis take side streets sometimes unnecessarily I think to show off their town knowledge.  It really doesn’t matter though, as all rides are $1.50.  No tip needed.
  • If you don’t sweat out and about, just go to the bano.  You will sweat then.
  • We head to point to look for sharks.  We see one, but feel like we missed the bunch earlier by the crowd.
  • Linds picks up the final present, a dad gift.  And wait.  I got the bracelet NOW, as I remember I made her walk back and we realized the street is longer than we thought.  Whoops.  Sorry, babe.
  • We wanted ice cream.  We stopped by Dulce Tent.  Do NOT do that ever.  We waited forever, it was more expensive, and the Thai roll of ice cream stunk.  Had better for less.  We walked.
  • Nightcap at TJ’s again, but on the Darwin side, not Binsford side.  The last night is SOOO hot.  Like during an excursion.  Excuse to go back to A/C in hotel room, and we are tired also.
  • Back roads in taxi.
  • No one can understand us say “Albatross Hotel.”
  • We get back to room, and the hardest, most steady rain I have ever seen starts.  Good timing.
  • We pack, watch shows in Spanish, and go to bed.
  • Day 10
  • We are heading to Guayaquil today.  Another “normal” breakfast with hot dogs.  Hot dogs are the DR take.  Not here.  But, yes, here.
  • Meeting time is 930am, and it is a short flight, and most of my clothes are all dirty or sweat through anyway, so we take a swim in the pool.  Cloudy from the rain, but still nice.
  • Finish up packing, think about getting on internet, but decide to wait for States.
  • I stayed almost fully unplugged during this trip.  Linds stayed connected when WIFI was there, but it was nice checking out.  When I did log on to text someone or check texts, I laid a few bets and then got offline again.
  • Apparently, we hear our next hotel is pretty stellar.
  • Back to the port in a bus.
  • Jump on a local boat and head to airport port.
  • Jump on airport bus.  I keep forgetting to ask about the blue and yellow, oddly distributed seats.
  • The foundations of many, many buildings, we find out, is an old US military base.  Once it left, people took all of the wall stuff for their own, and just left the bottom of the buildings in the desert.
  • Oddly, the airport has pizza, burgers, hot dogs, cafes, etc.
  • Our flight is delayed, we grab food and Club beer.  She hates her burger, my pizza suffices.  We are mainly sitting in this area because the breeze is the best thing EVER.
  • There is a VIP section in this tiny airport.  Not sure how to get in.
  • Another LATAM flight with seats that go ABC JKL
  • Wife again is more relaxed in international airport than domestic one.  Not sure why.  We make flight.
  • We walk out to plane, and apparently LATAM is borrowing a plane from a competitor.
  • The exit row my wife got us was NICE, but we aren’t allowed bags at ALL.  Weird.
  • I finish Man’s Search for Meaning on the way back.  Excellent, life-changing book I will say.
  • Again, people deplane internationally and do NOT wait to go row by row.  Very frustrating.  I want to learn Spanish just to communicate this to them.
  • We enter Guayaquil Airport.  One by one, they screen people’s temp because of Coronavirus.  Aside from talk about it, first we have seen remnants of it.
  • We take bus to Unipark Hotel, which is pretty close.  Glimpse of city we only have a few hours in.  We get room # 811.  Another 11 number.  Have I not mentioned that every hotel room we have been in has been an 11 except one?  My lucky number is 11.  That is cool.
  • We still haven’t figured out what PB is in hotels down here.  Not lobby, but PB…hmmm.
  • We are hungry and tired, but have an immediate tour with Albert of the city.  One time shot, so we get onboard.  This is what we learn.
  • This is a safe city.  No kids running around jacking cell phones.
  • The Cathedral of Guayaquil is right by the hotel.  Looks similar to Notre Dame.
  • The hotel is right by the main town square.  It is called Iguana Park.  It has about 100 iguanas in this small area.  Birds sit on them.  Turtles hang out.  It is a mecca of people and wildlife.
  • This is a new city.  They apparently, unlike Quito, got pissed about the Spaniards invading.  When it ended, they burned everything down that was Spanish.  Everything in the city is 1905 or newer.  They were the first “free” city.  They did it without war.  Lots of monuments on our tour to show this fact.
  • 3.5 million people in the city, making it slightly larger than Quito.
  • Simon Bolivar statue in Iguana Park.  It reminds me of Jackson Square in New Orleans actually, where I proposed to Lindsey.
  • Iguanas exist outside of the park, and they are mean ones.  Not human friendly.
  • In Guayaquil, there is a hot and hotter season.  Lowest recorded temperature is about 50 degrees.
  • We walk through the administrative space in town.  Beautiful.  Statues all over the place.  The Municipal Building is the famous one.  Lots of pics and a family of PARROTS is chilling out in the upper floors.  PARROTS.  Six statues line the walking area outside of this building.  They are the six emotions of the city.  He said them too fast, but I assume they are inline with the emotions of Ekman or whoever.
  • When they negotiated peace, they did it with 40 vs 400 men in the army.  Jose Romero apparently was a better sales person than me and everyone else, and had the rich, the soldiers, and the rest all agree to be free.  The man.  There is a monument showing this in a cool way.  I got a selfie with the guy.
  •  Quito earned its freedom two years later.
  • I basically am learning that this city is cool as shit and the rest of the world are not.
  • Their here is a poet, not a soldier.
  • We are here for a few hours on Sunday, when everything is closed.  Great.  Well, it is right by the water, and that place looks JAMMING.
  • The Malecon is 2.5km long.  Right by the water.  The river has plants floating down it. The river can change direction of flow.  It does that right after we learn this.  Actually, it can float BOTH ways.
  • The river rises 5m annually.
  • The river is 40km from Pacific.  It is a peaceful river, but you can’t swim in it.
  • There is a Captain Morgan ship right off the entrance to the Malecon.  Lots of pirates in this country’s history.  Like the ones who carried around the tortoises to eat.
  • Think of a boardwalk on a river.
  • There is a Yacht Club with a big sign.  No yachts though.  Been banned for 70 years.
  • Only water taxi’s are allowed on this river.  They take people to the island across the way.  To hang out and look at trees.  It has crocodiles and mangroves apparently.
  • Sometimes thunder and lightning touches the river.
  • Trees are cool here because they are a COMMUNITY of trees.  Different types of trees marrying together to form one.  Like, roots hang down from branches.
  • Monkeys, iguanas, and mccaws are popular animals around here.
  • Live comedians and a live band perform, even though this is slow Sunday.
  • There is a children’s park I never want to see again. 
  • I have decided that this is interesting but Exoticca just doesn’t care about when you eat.  A red flag should be on their site that says “carry granola bars!”
  • The main monument in this area is the semi-circular one with Simon Bolivar and Jose San Martin.  Apparently, the first guy to make this monument made them both the same height and that is untrue.  So, the next person who did it was Spanish, and that also was a problem.  All kinds of stories about witchcraft and such.  The monument has the Whispering Wall feature from DC too.  Neat.
  • A neat space off the path here was Jardones Del Mclean Sector VI.  It was a manmade river area.  It was closed for us, but looked cool.  It was built as a conservatory forest area for animals to live like in the wild.
  • Tour ends.  Food court time.
  • Not just ANY food court, but a local one with two buildings and AIR CONDITIONAING!!!
  • Scott and Jen join us for this venture.
  • Ironically, we pass by a massive McDonalds walking to the food court.  I kept going and followed my wife.
  • La Cantina had drinks, but you could point to the item and he wouldn’t understand.  Wife to the rescue.
  • By the way, forget if I mentioned it, but Spanish is the official language here, but since there are so many tribes, it is a slightly off dialect of Spanish. Many words are different.
  • We decide to share one more bowl of LOCRO.  Yay.  One more ride.  We also get ceviche one last time here.  We go to Porksya to get pork and steak and sausage.  Delicious.  Wife has Sangria poured out of a big cannister oddly, I have Pilsener, which they love so much as a beer that a city is named after it.  Or vice versa.  Whatever.
  • Every beer here is Stella, Club, Pilsener, or Corona.
  • We go back to hotel.  We seek out the hot tub.  It is cold.  I go enjoy my first walk-in shower of trip, and set alarm for 125am, as our meet time is at 2am.  Brutal.
  • Day 11
  • 130am wakeup time.
  • Long passport line at 230am.
  • Lots of meal places open in airport for this hour.
  • Very new airport.  Nice.
  • I eat at Astoria, and get a bagel with CREAM CHEESE.
  • My phone never adjusted to Ecuador or Galapagos time.  Weird.
  • Air hand dryers need to be WIDER, folks.
  • Clorox wipes on planes now routine.
  • Sleep.
  • We will be back.  I can skip Quito next time, but would stay in Mindo, Guayaquil, or the islands.  We have too many other places to visit in our lives.  Probably we will just be back for Galapagos.
  • Oddly, no scan into Miami during this Coronavirus stuff.  Weird.
  • Come back home, and then COVID-19 stuff hits the FAN. And this travel journal looks like it is PAUSED.  Dammit.
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