Mahhk is doing his pahht by ranting on planes coming from Bahston.
Read it, don’t read it, I don’t care…just needed to get some things off my chest.
In no particular order of chronology or importance…
On the clock. Airplane rant, but in about an hour, I will have not one but TWO fantastic football games on. That will be too much going on. But, too much work to do tomorrow, so let’s clear the list. Let’s turn and burn.
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1) Greetings and salutations, all. This might be the best 4 hour flight ever. Upgraded seating, no one next to me, football on the free tube, legs almost totally straight, computer screen fully up and visible, etc. I DO have ONE single complaint about my new favorite airplane company, JetBlue. This is the second straight flight where I can’t hear what the hell they are saying over the microphone. Plus, you hear static if you are plugged in to their TV. Isn’t that kind of important if something happens? I guess the money they saved on the lower tier audio equipment went towards the free TV’s. I literally am sitting pretty close to how I would be spread out at home on my couch.
2) Lindsey must be going crazy watching this game at home. Baylor is finally facing a test, and it is showing right now. There are 11 minutes left in the second. The first quarter was a standoff. Already in the 2nd quarter this has happened. There was a targeting penalty called, but then they decided to not eject the Baylor kid. After moving down the rest of the field literally only with Baylor penalties, they got stopped at the goal line by that Baylor kid not ejected for targeting. Then, Baylor, a spread offense that needs the space, gets sacked for a safety. Then, OU gets a huge kickoff return. Wait a minute. This is not a report and the game will be done by the time you read this. Let’s get to the list. Sorry, I am excited about both these games.
3) I love Boston Logan Airport. It is clean, fast, practically built, close to the city, has plenty of electric ports, has Dunkin Donuts, and has NO TRAIN. Love it.
4) Dunkin Donuts is seriously the shit and the fact that it is east coast based is indeed one downfall of living in Denver.
5) I don’t care how many commercials you show me with reviews, Mr. TV. I still am going to assume the new Thor sucks.
6) It’s gone viral, and I am glad I watched it live to know what the heck people are talking about. The new name for FSU’s QB is Jameis Squintson. Apparently, he doesn’t wear his contacts on the field and has to squint constantly to see the coaches’ play calls. Not sure how his receivers feel about that, but it seems to be working well thus far.
7) It must have been an awesome scene when Gary Kubiak visited the Texans today. Good stuff.
8) Clay Matthews is coming back this week supposedly. Since he is active again, I hope that stops him from making those seriously eerie commercials.
9) Before I got on the plane, I saw the headline “Tyson’s book: my whole life was a joke.” I wouldn’t say that, Mike. I would just say that after not training as hard and losing to Buster Douglas that you didn’t handle it mentally the most efficient or successful way. You went straight to absurdness.
10) Joe Girardi says that A-Rod’s hearing “complicates things.” I would say that the combination of him being good, being an idiot, and also a cheater complicates things.
11) Jay Cutler is back to action. Along with being a whiner, at least we also know he is a fast healer.
12) Yay. An entire can of Coke Zero. With two cups of ice. I will just use this extra seat table to hold them. I seriously look like I have set up camp.
13) It came out that not only did Martin go to the hospital, but that apparently he had problems with others also. OK. Maybe this is not as cut and dry as a racial slur as we thought. That must be why they ordered the Code Red. The players supporting Richie also tells me this is more complicated.
14) I ate at Logan Airport. They had a hot dog for about 15 NFL teams. Ponto saw the ingredients Of the Pittsburgh dog and decided it was literally made for me. Hot dog with over easy eggs, bacon, and cheese. It was delicious.
15) I apparently was the first person to tell the server that they spelled my team’s name wrong. “Stealers?”
16) Dodgers crazy man Yasiel Puig had charges brought against him and then dropped for being a designated driver and swerving at 1am. That sounds about right.
17) When will Winger come into conversation when discussing this Martin-Incognito thing?
18) (You know. “Down Incognito?” Winger? It must be a glam rock thing.)
19) These blue potato chips JetBlue gives out are seriously dope.
20) Congrats to UL’s Kevin Ware, who has officially made it back from that utterly gruesome injury last year on the court.
21) The latest person to get the Cubs back to winning ways is Rick Renteria. At least it is a great town to live in, Rick.
22) And passionate fans, Rick. A Bears fan this week tasered his Packer fan wife as he thought the bet they made was actually real. This actually happened.
23) If you don’t know who Paul George is yet, then you are seriously just a very distant, casual basketball fan. Folks, look him up or catch a game. His Pacers are 5-0 going into tonight, and he amazingly looks even better.
24) Broncos John Moffitt quit football and left $1 million on the table. He doesn’t love football enough. This would be the extremely poor man’s version of Barry Sanders I suppose.
25) I am sure Logan will like that I am informing you that Arsenal beat Dortmund in Champions League this week. You are now informed.
26) Suh wanted Cutler to start this week. We the fans want him nowhere near a microphone.
27) Say it ain’t so. Tony Dorsett has shown CTE symptons. Shame for a very good guy.
28) Boston is awesome. We walked on cobblestone streets, saw the water, and had some food at the oldest restaurant in the U.S. Love that town.
29) I also enjoyed the local woman on the mic at the airport saying the word “departure.” DePAHTCH er.
30) My colleague, Brian, once said after I told him via text that a couple I was sitting next to was irritating…”Boston irritating or lovey dovey irritating.”
31) You know what you get when you stay at a Hampton Inn, and I like all of it. Not too much, just what I need, and free breakfast and wifi.
32) A San Diego Padres affiliate has named their club the El Paso Chihuahuas. Ok.
33) Uh oh. Baylor scored, intercepted it, and scored again. 24-5. Lindsey can’t be happy. Always seeing the positive side of things, at least I won’t have to flip between two football games.
34) When Lindsey watches Masters of Sex, and I am ignoring it doing other things, she frequently catches me watching it silently from the kitchen during the nude parts.
35) Did someone tell me that the upcoming Anchorman is having Don’t Stop Believing by Journey in it? Say it ain’t so. Please. 13 years of bartending during karaoke nights will make you hate that song also.
36) The Dallas Cowboys are not exactly lighting it up this year. Fans should be happy to learn that they also are $31 million over the cap in 2014. A lot of wasted money going around that club.
37) Matt Hasselbeck will retire after the 2014 season. Poor guy. He is having some combination of the Dave Krieg, Jon Kitna, and Rich Gannon career. Gannon would probably be the closest match. A couple pretty good years with a narrow miss in the Super Bowl when my Steelers “beat” him.
38) I have it in quotes because I watched it and am a realist.
39) One tiny other thing I don’t like about JetBlue. The volume and channel changer for the TV is right where I put my arms. I have almost blown out my ears a few times.
40) College picks, although I am not going to elaborate on why for any of them. I like Cincy at home minus 9 against SMU, Illinois getting 10 points at Indiana, Missouri minus 14 ½ at Kentucky, Florida minus 10 at home vs. Vandy, Texas Tech minus 3 at home vs. K State, Notre Dame minus 4 ½ at Pittsburgh, Tennessee getting 7 ½ at home vs. Auburn, and I will take the 12 points and LSU. Bama will win, but I think it will be more like 7-10 points.
41) I am debating on changing format again and only picking 3-4 things to write about daily, but I have to tell you-I like the free form rant. I will keep you in the loop. The reason I like hitting everything is because I never know what I am going to say about each thing, and if I only wrote about a few things, I feel it would take a little more thought and organization. Not a whole lot of free time outside of work and a few hobbies.
42) That is it. It is halftime and the Oregon-Stanford game just started. I can’t do all three things. I am going to stretch out in my airplane fort and watch the games mindlessly. Hope you enjoyed. Will I blog tomorrow? That is a CLOWN question, bro. Peace.