R.O.U.S.
Read it, don’t read it, I don’t care…just needed to get some things off my chest.
In no particular order of chronology or importance…
Sort of on the clock. I am writing this during first half of NBA game, so I obviously want to be done by the beginning of the second half. My work days have been PACKED this week. NO time for lunch time blogs. Let’s turn and burn.
NO BLOG TOMORROW. NO TIME DURING WORK DAY, AND THEN WORK EVENT AT NIGHT. LOOK FOR A SOLID ONE ON FRIDAY.
EMAIL: mark_filler@hotmail.com
TWITTER: @fillerbuster11
1) I am getting goose bumps thinking about this Pacers-Heat series. THIS is the TYPE of team that can give Miami problems. People outside of the basketball junkie circle or Indiana might not know much about them, but they have the inside presence to give the Heat a run. I predict a minimum of six games no matter who wins. If Hibbert can stay out of foul trouble, Paul George can assist others in scoring since LeBron will be guarding him, George Hill can remain healthy, and the Pacers can NOT turn over the ball a lot and limit transition baskets, we will have a special series. This Pacers team could have played with the old school, playoff tough teams (yes, I think the 80’s Lakers, Philly, Celtics, and Pistons would beat the Heat or whoever). This breakdown, of course, is assuming LeBron doesn’t get into a groove and have some ridiculous series on the stat line.
2) Do you remember when we were all asking last season if Giants P Matt Cain was one of the top three pitchers in baseball? I do. I also just double checked his ERA this season. Dude has jumped up to a 5.12 ERA. He is having drinks with Rick Ankiel right now.
2a) Google Rick Ankiel if you don’t get that joke. It is funny.
3) The way the NBA lottery shook out, it made it really interesting. The Cavs will take Nerlens Noel most likely, and Orlando, who just signed SG Aaron Afflalo to a 3 year contract, will have Ben McLemore dangling in front of their face at #2. I smell a big trade.
4) And THEN you have the Washington Wizards at #3. Think they select Georgetown product Otto Porter? They have subconsciously scouted the local product his entire career.
5) The Griz made an amazing comeback against the Spurs…and then lost a heartbreaking one. Random notes. Mike Conley got called for a ghost foul in the second quarter. This hurt because they had to take him out with three fouls, and then the Spurs made a run. It is not a good thing when your star big man attempts his first free throw in the SERIES with 8:21 left in the third quarter, Memphis. Big three AND new blood for the Spurs. Kawhi Leonard is shooting .632 for the series. Just saying. The Griz had two chances in 4th to go ahead, and flailed. That was a BS flagrant foul with 26.1 seconds left. Don’t decide the game, refs, unless you are sure. Duncan showed in OT why he still has gas in the tank, and has experience galore. Jerryd Bayless had a hell of a game off the bench, but that late shot he bricked was brutal to watch. You can’t do heat checks in extra time. Finally, WHY did the Griz call TWO consecutive timeouts in extra time????? You need every one you get when a game goes OT.
6) I attended a “wellness” seminar today that gets our company lower insurance rates. It was about food additives. There was a break where we could ask a question. I asked about Coke Zero. I never got a straight answer, AND the person giving the lecture said that Vanilla Coke Zero was her favorite. Well, THAT helps me cure my addiction.
7) Phil Jackson said he laughed when the Lakers told him over the phone that they selected Mike D’Antoni over him for their coach this season. The Clippers have Blake Griffin and MAYBE Chris Paul and have just fired Del Negro as their coach. See where I am going with this???? Not only does he have a star, not only will it lure Chris Paul back to the team for max money, but he ALSO gets to screw over the team that most recently screwed HIM? That would be gold. Gold (Seinfeld reference). Ovaltine.
8) You (we) are lucky. My list today was huge, but I am shifting most of this stuff to the weekend rant. I have a second half to focus on, and the 2nd quarter is about to begin.
9) My shower sometimes turns super hot where I almost have to jump out of the shower. I am warned by a VERY slight fluctuation in the sound (probably why I can’t listen to a radio in the shower). I feel like every time I take a shower, I am doing the bathroom version of the Fire Swamp and the R.O.U.S. STILL my favorite comedy, and in my top five of ALL time. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BOv5ZjAOpC8
10) I would now like to go see a Spurs game someday. In both games of this Memphis series, I heard in the background at a timeout the song from the Bourne movies that ISN’T on the soundtracks. Yes, I just admitted that I once literally went out and purchased the Bourne Soundtracks. I am the #1 fan. I should get a t-shirt.
11) Thanks, Sergio, for POSSIBLY appearing like you had a CHANCE at being right in your spat with Tiger, and then going racial with the fried chicken remark. You just irritated me before. I think now I truly dislike you. You are following the same path as Snowball with my likes and dislikes. No, that is not true. I actually hated you in the beginning when you took 50 practice strokes. I know I have mentioned that a couple times (sorry), but I really did hate it.
12) Thank you, Geno Smith, for adding to the idiocy of the New York Jets. You are not even a starter yet, and you have said to the media you are guaranteeing the playoffs. Geez. What goes on in that locker room? You are there for less than two weeks, and you just become dumb. Confused.
13) What? So I can’t eat FOOD before my surgery, correct? Love ya, Gronk. The night before surgery, and dude gets busted on camera at a bar. http://deadspin.com/was-rob-gronkowski-out-in-nyc-the-night-before-his-late-509072090
14) Always sweet seeing the saucer in hockey. Better that it was hockey pro Tie Domi’s kid. http://deadspin.com/tie-domis-son-pulls-off-between-the-legs-saucer-pass-509000699
15) Brian Urlacher retired today. I still think he had something left in the tank personally, but happy that someone is able to retire on their own terms relatively near the top of their game. Or, maybe talking with Jay Cutler everyday had something to do with it. Probably a combination of both. Cutler irritates me, and I have never talked with him. Jeff George take 2.
15a) Google Jeff George too. Rocket arm, asshole, and no big wins.
16) Tony Parker is getting an MRI today. The basketball world is hoping it is negative. If the Heat make the Finals, I would like the series to be watchable. Yes, Memphis also has the interior presence, but come on. I just started thinking. What if it was Memphis-Indiana? Would I be the only person outside of my boss, Mark, my ex-boss, Vince, my fraternity buddy, Scott, or anyone in Memphis or Indiana that would watch it?
17) Indiana is up by five, and Bosh just got his third. Yup. Enjoying that interior presence of Indiana, Chris?
18) Hibbert got hit in the junk in the second quarter. I love to hear announcers pick either the midsection, the groin, or the upper quadriceps as we watch the guy on the ground holding his business.
19) The NFL is still mulling over an 18 game season and expanding the playoffs. Don’t. Please. You and baseball are perfectly fine just as they are.
20) Coach K will return as USA’s coach. We are all happy. We are back at the top of the world (funny that I just wrote that during that Red Bull commercial where that loon skydives in an astronaut’s suit). Plus, after earning $9 million last year according to his tax return, I guess his wife is ok with it.
21) My brother sent me a funny text today. “It was Josh Hamilton’s (who is SUCKING this year) birthday yesterday. He really wanted a bicycle. All Mike Trout could get him was a cycle.” My brother and I are linked with Trout because Trout works out at the same gym as my brother in tiny Vineland, NJ (where we had to go 20 minutes away to see movies or go to the gym growing up), and I like Bryce Harper better.
22) Speaking of Bryce, way to come clean, bro. When asked about him flinching approaching the wall after being out of position, he came clean and admitted that loss was ALL on him. Classy. He said of course he flinched as he had just run into a wall. True dat. That WASN’T a clown question I guess. I am still bothered why he was bunting earlier in that game when the bench coaches said to the media that those calls weren’t coming from them.
23) Side note. The next “youngest” record has been put on his resume. Mike Trout is the youngest AL’er to hit for the cycle. LOTS of firsts coming for that guy.
24) Maybe I am being over-analytical, but I don’t think this new Google movie is going to be that funny. The comedy duo should have made Wedding Crashers 4, or whatever the hell # they are on.
25) A shout out to my Twitter sports buddy. Follow him (preferably after following me). But, he tweets MUCH more. I am at 1-2 times a day. That is enough for me. Anyway, as I have said before, he knows his sports, is funny, and his only downfall is that he is a Duke fan. @Logesmadoges
26) Finally, Charles Woodson went to the Raiders. Yes, I know he can be more of an influence on that team than the Broncos. Yes, it was more money. Yes, Charles already HAS a ring. But, if there ever was a case for going for the money and not for winning, it is this case. Dude, I am unbiased as I am a Steelers fan, but WITHOUT you the Broncos are one of the Super Bowl favorites. Have a good time in the Bay Area.
27) That is it. We are at halftime, and I have an undisturbed 2nd half to watch of this game. I hope you are having fun in Madrid or whatever cool location you are at right now, Linds. Listen to Bourne music as you travel. I appreciate once again the increased reader base. Hope you enjoyed. I am off tomorrow, but will do a post work, Friday night one two days from now. Will I blog tomorrow? That is a CLOWN question, bro. I still have to SAY my tagline, even if it is not true.