Soda is good too. Seven is better.

Read it, don’t read it, I don’t care…just needed to get some things off my chest.

In no particular order of chronology or importance…

On the clock.  Not an airplane rant.  Evening rant.  Semi-speed version.  Let’s turn and burn.

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1. Greetings and salutations, people.  Thanks for coming aboard (the boat).  I was going to organize this into a hook, line, and sinker blog, but that sounded like too much energy after a long work day and I have too much going on in about 35 minutes.  Blogging with ONE game I care about is fine.  Blogging when I have two games going on is too much.  Especially since hockey has limited breaks.  Need to watch the NBA game and the Blackhawks game.
2. I will start with this. Two of my favorite things in life are pizza and haiku.  So, this link really hits home.  After all, I have officially INVENTED what I call the “pizza stomach,” an alternative stomach I only use when I find free pizza accidentally after I just ate a full meal.  It is very useful.  I networked with cows to find out how to do it.    http://www.buzzfeed.com/moniquesteele/haikus-for-the-dedicated-pizza-enthusiast#.abBvOXvElL  
3. Mike Conley is not interested in a contract extension with the Griz. To the naked eye, this doesn’t make sense, as he is on a borderline contender and can get more money.  But, after further evaluation, we see this.  An extension would make his next contract year when he is post 30 years old.  Get the dough NOW.  And, no one really knows what Marc Gasol will do with his upcoming freedom.  And, who really believes at this point in life that Zach Randolph is championship material.  No, he is a very good player good for 18 and 10 every game.  There is no killer instinct or higher level.  
4. Rory tossed a club? AAAHHHHHHHHH!!!!!  He must be evil.  I am glad I didn’t take up golf and become really good.  I would have been Tin Cup on crack.  
5. I refuse to read the whole story, but think it is kind of lame Ray Rice’s charges were dismissed with ANY technicalities after watching him drag his woman out of an elevator.
6. Someone in the NFL IS going to L.A. in the next year or two, fans will be sad, and glad I am a fan of the Steelers, a team that will NEVER leave their city.
7. Loved reading the article on ESPN this week about how awesomely horrible or horribly awesome their bumblebee uni’s are. I personally LOVE them.  
8. Here is hoping for Broncos fans that this “sexual charge” investigation actions on Antonio Smith are for something harmless or turn out to be nothing.
9. I had about 15 jokes circulating in my head about Hernandez and his “lifetime” tattoo, but nothing really totally came together. Make your own up.  It might be a fun game.  Make a drinking game out of it.  
10. I am a PROUD man if I am Madison Bumgarner today, not that he wasn’t before with HIS postseason resume. To beat the best in the business AND homer against him is simply DOPE.
11. Where the HELL are my shoes? How do TWO shelves disappear on a Friday night when I never wore them anywhere and our condo is small?  I feel like I am in a more mature shoe version of Dude, Where’s My Car?  I still think the cat is involved in this mystery.  
12. I flew Alaska Airlines on the way back from Seattle, and I am ranking it officially behind JetBlue as my go to/ favorite airline for coach airplane rides. Shame I can’t use either of them more.  Free drinks, no bag fees, more leg room, ultra polite staff,  free video WIFI, internet you could purchase, and of course no plane crash, which is always good.  And that dude on the tail looks like a fun dude.  
13. Anaheim just scored.
14. I have never seen a hot goalie become so transparent as this year with the Rangers Lundqvist.
15. Tampa Bay is freaking FAST.  The Rangers just play fast.  The Lightning play fast and ARE fast.  Actually, if I am wrong about the Rangers losing to the Blackhawks, the HUGE Ducks against the FAST Lightning would be a good final matchup.
16. Dwight Howard is questionable tonight, and considering I already had pegged the Warriors to ROLL after the close call the other night, I am even more on that side now. My dream is that the Blackhawks game goes to OT, the Warriors get way ahead in the second half, and then I can just watch hockey from 8-930pm.
17. Blackhawks power play. Double minor.
18. The Cavs are going to win their series, ok? Nice start with Josh Smith lighting it up.  I also had 15 jokes about that circulating in my head all day, but instead of doing it myself, I thought Deadspin covered that sarcasm EXTREMELY well.  http://deadspin.com/j-r-smith-is-quite-possibly-too-real-1706106796
19. Here is a scary stat. JR Smith had ALL of the bench points.  Doubt me?  
20. If you don’t click on my links, you are really missing a lot of my jokes. I don’t do bad links, and they finish my hook very well.  Don’t be shy.
21. I am now 1 for 3 and hope a learning curve is now forming. The Demon Kitty started playing with me while I was typing on this PC watching TV on the couch, I said no, and now he is laying quietly next to me.  He was not so good the last couple times.  WAIT a minute.  The last time he was good was also during a hockey game.  A BLACKHAWKS game.  I have a hockey cat who likes my bandwagon team.  THAT is dope.
22. I Googled “hockey cat” for fun.  
23. Not that I advocate ANY of this, but for some of you, Deadspin provides an instructional on something only SOME of you might be interested in. Belay my last on this link.  Clicking on this one is optional and only for fun people.  http://flygirl.jezebel.com/how-to-bring-drugs-on-an-airplane-1693383755
24. I guess the link pretty much spells it out.  It is just funny because this is a day after I posted that Deadspin put up an article about whether the Pope masturbates.  NO boundaries Deadspin has.
25. No idea why I just wrote that like Yoda.  
26. If you couldn’t guess 4 of the 5 first team NBA players, then you really shouldn’t tell ANYONE in the near future you like the NBA, ok? Marc Gasol was the toughest call, but most would figure it out since the lack of true NBA centers these days is honestly frightening.  James, Harden, Curry, Davis.  Come on.
27. Some newer Seinfelds were on when I got home today.  LOVE the Seven episode.  
28. As a younger brother, I am saying I think Marc is calling Pau and giving him a little shit about him being first team and the older brother being second team. This coming from the dumb kid who swam exactly 305 laps in a swim-a-thon once he found out his older brother swam 304 earlier.  It was rude.  I have apologized.
29. I can’t focus as the bball game tips in 10 minutes, the Blackhawks just scored, and Lindsey is not home for three hours, so I have the house to myself.  Well, me and the Demon.  Hope you enjoyed or are at least more informed.  Will I blog tomorrow?  That is a CLOWN question, bro (.333, 15, 38, .472).  Peace.